We're only about 5 1/2 months in to this and a lot of outsiders are telling me I need to take time for me and go out but i'm so scared to leave my husband alone and don't really feel right leaving him with others. How long did it take for you?

Mine told me to go out. You have to take time for you too! Talk to him about it and see what his concerns are.....Duke is home with the kids or by himself ALOT now

Hi there, I was scared to leave my husband alone at first too, but I had no choice. I had to take my daughter to school, I had to go food shopping and I had to take care off things. It was really scary at first but it got better. You need to trust your instincts. It's much easier now because my husband can be on the computer and send me message to my cell phone when he needs me or reply to me to let me know he's ok when I get worried about him. Its usually me thats more stressed out than him...lol! Good luck and you'll know when you are ready but it will get easier over time!

Keleigh

He probably won't break anymore than he already is. Start with short periods, a walk around the block or a short errand. It will be good for you and build his confidence in being alone.

I am the Mother of Amber C5 complete and I had a hard time leaving her too. And actually if your situation is anything like mine where she can not move to get help then you can not leave them for long by themselves. But if he is able to finction some that is different.
You do need to find help that you trust so you can get out some.You have to take care of yourself too.
Outings would be good for him too. With this high of an injury it is harder but still possible. For Amber's one year anniversary of her injury we drov from Texas to the Grand Canyon and then on to California and back. Just so you know--it can be done. Life does get gradually better.
Good Luck,
Catherine
Mom/Caregiver of Amber age 25 injury C5-6 complete 6/25/08

hey sweetie....get out when you can. You NEED time to heal, too. It's ok to laugh/cry have fun on your own or with friends. We have too many hard days....we truly deserve a good day of our own every once in a while. When I get out, I like to gamble(pennies of course). Its mindless fun and truly takes you away. My husband likes to see me excited about life.....it lessons the burden on him about how his injury impacted my life. Just be a little selfish every once in a while and have back up people you can count on if he needs help....then TRUST them and go. Good luck, honey. Have a little fun.

Thank you so much for the sweet post. I'm getting better at having a little "me time", it's getting easier as time goes by. My Mother in law has been in town for 2 weeks and it's helping me ease in to leaving him wile I go out for a little bit. I just need to find some new friends, most of mine headed for the nearest exit when Brady was hurt. I sure wish my friends took a lesson from his, his friends have been angels.

wish you lived closer, we could just leave our husbands and kids together

It would be cute, their own little play date.

I like to go to BINGO once in awhile. I think that was my first "outing". I went with Pauls sisters. I have a few pretty amazing girlfriends - 3 to be exact. My mother is awesome too. So I have 4 wonderful women to hang with. Sometimes I like to get a little buzz on... but it's hard when I have to get Paul off to bed and all. So one night Paul offered to go to bed early and I had my friends come over for a girls night. I put a movie on for Paul around 8:00. Then my friends and I had a few drinks and I just checked on Paul throughout the night. It was so nice. He was so happy to see me buzzed lol. I also slept in (cath & turn every 4 hrs. and back to sleep).