QUOTE (greybeard @ Oct 17 2009, 08:33 AM)
Why is it that as you get older, your facial hair grows more vigorously at the time when your head hair gets thinner?
Another for the guys:
Why is it that at the time your gut develops an overhang, your dick shrinks, making it even harder to find?
Capt' Greybus sir,
Depending on what kind of beer you drink, the human body is filled with what are called essential fluids necessary for proper development and maturation. (not masturbation, old bean, those are other fluids)
These fluids, called "life sustaining juices" by those in the industry are what proliferates hair growth, both facial and cranial.
As men maturate gravity rears it's ugly head and yanks said fluids inexorably downward. I'm sure you can imagine what happens next.
From first hand experience you have SEEN what happens next. And judging from photos of you, IT AIN'T PRETTY!
This also happens to women, only to a lesser degree. My mother eventually became a bearded lady carnival freak to help me get through pyrotechnic school. Upon graduation I started making fireworks for children's birthday parties but having "tequila-ed" my way through more than half the classes, I made a mistake, or shall we say I blew it by adding too much of one thing into another and blew a birthday-boy's head off taking with it my thumb and two of my fingers from my left hand. Needless to say, I left town under a cloud of cordite and found employment that didn't require the use of all digits in another part of the state.
As far as gut overhang verses dick shrinkage goes; when men maturate (women mature. men maturate.) the stomach harvests fat cells from where ever it can. Don't ask me why. Do I look like a penile expert to you? Don't answer that, my reach is far and castigation will be harsh! The pecker being the closest doner site, is the first to suffer. Here again photos of you present irrefutable evidence. Of course rich folks can afford fattier foods, there by needing less fat cells for the belly. That's why well to do men are so well endowed. Bet ya never would have guessed that one, eh?
Anyway, as a good anarchist I must continue to spread chaos throughout the land and today is a busy day indeed so adios amigos,
E-dog the peripatetic paraplegic pecker professor
BANG!
)
woman who sued the manufacturer, for not advising against it, after she killed her dog by "drying" it in her microwave, but is it really necessary that manufacturers should need to apply "idiot" labels to their products? 
Simple answer is that lightning is caused by different electrical forces between the clouds and the earth balancing themselves out. It travels down the line of least resistance which sometimes makes it appear unpredictable. Wet trees are not good things to stand or lay under during a lightning storm as the water makes them excellent electrical conductors.
Just gently shakes her head in a sort of sad way and wanders off, muttering under her breath. 
. . . . 
perhaps I've just been in bed toooooo long 
