just wondering how people balance the reality of today, with hope for the future? Do you cling on to just enough hope to keep you going, but say if things never change that's okay too? seems like a delicate balance, hope & acceptance... any thoughts?

I never thought about this before. The way I see things is that I have a very good life right now, and there's no reason to want to change it. If they found a cure for spinal cord injury then it would most likely be something they could do right after the injury to help, at least at first, but if they do find a "cure" for people who already have injuries then if I had the opportunity to use it then I'd have to think about that if the time came.

I just live my life the best way I can like I did before, and don't even worry about it. Why spend your life waiting around for a "cure" when you can just go out and continue living life and putting everything you can into having a good time? Of course this is just my opinion and people are entitled to their opinions, but I just thought I'd say what I believe.

I guess it's all in what you're hoping for.

I would truly love to get up and walk again. I was nearly 60 years ab, so , naturally I miss it.

Considering what could have been, I'm satisfied, for now. No difficult balancing needed.

Odds are, I wouldn't have swum the channel anyway ( tho I suppose I could now if I ever learn to swim).

Acceptance of what "is" is essential whether walking or rolling. It is the only way to get through life with some bit of sanity.

Hope is good, too. Just depends on what you're hoping for.
ed

thanks for your input. i guess since it's so early in the process for us (we are still waiting for our friend to come home from rehab) it’s hard to tell what the future holds. so i guess i just hope that his body heals as much as it possibly can and that he finds some peace in his mind. we are all "hoping" and "praying" for "the best" i just don't know what to hold onto, realistically.

i don't know if i am making much sense...bare with me!

kim&sophie, i do like what you said about living your life to the fullest, and having as much fun as you can, big cheers to that! you have a great outlook - i can hope for that!! acceptance I hope will come as well, ed...

Well not that having a spinal cord injury is a walk (or roll LOL) in the park......but it sure beats death. Your friend and their attitude will change with time. They say "time heals all wounds"; to a point this is true. After some time has passed his/her feelings and attitude will hopefully change. I'm sort or going on the assumption that your friend is having some trouble adjusting......hence the reason for your asking this question. If you would have asked me how I felt when I 1st got hurt I'd have told you that this was horrible and living this way was NOT duable. But that was then this is now. If they could find a "cure" would I take it? Sure I would! But I don't stop today to wonder if they'll come up with a fix. I'm content to have as much fun as I can and smile and laugh whenever possible. I think Kim is right that whenever they do find a cure it will probably help those newly injured before the swelling and such sets in. My mother was/is an OT, so when I got hurt she was able to find people who were already using wheelchairs (it was a mix of disabled all their life and those who had been "normal" at one point) I think that helped me get out of that "stinkin' thinkin'". "Stinkin' thinkin' is what we call negative thinking or being in a "pity party". Those people showed me that you could still roll through life with a smile on your face, and a song in your heart. I think at 1st hope was only dangling by a thread........but now I'm past that and have moved on to climbing that mountain I had been only previously dangling from.

I hope this helps, and send your friend on in. We'll roll out the welcome mat (FYI it's blue not red ).

I am only 9 months post injury. At first the doctors said that I would never walk again. I started healing faster than they thought. I am now walking with a cane with a AFO on my right leg. At first I was very depressed because of the things that I couldn't do that I wanted to do. Than I decided to start trying to do those old things. I like it when someone says that I cannot do something because I make it my goal to prove than wrong. The only thing now that I need to get the courage up to do is drive my car. Things do get better as time goes by.

I am just over a year post my operation and was told at the time that I would walk normally again.I guess they were a tad over optimistic or thought they would tell me what I wanted to hear. I still struggle walking with crutches and I guess I will have a long way to go and know now that I will never walk normally again.

Despite that I have slowly gotten my life back and do most of the things I used to do. Since I started driving again recently I am now also doing my own shopping again. I nice big rucksack for the heavy stuff and a couple of bags for the light stuff carried with crutches in hand and I am away.

Living on my own it is not always easy to keep my spirits up. My family live in another country, but I have a good network of friends. Still my independance means a lot to me and I have to say that I am proud of the fact that I have regained that. Driving again is also allowing me to persue other treatments like hydrotherapy and massages.

As long as your friend can focus on getting as much of his/her life back to what it was and go out and do things every little success will keep up the hope to get better at doing things. I find it a great challenge thinking of ways of doing something in a different way to what I used to.