11 replies to this topic

[Jessesgirl511]

Hey there,
My hunny is probably getting discharged out of the rehab in a few weeks. He has been in the hospital since 12/6/08. I am really excited about him coming home but now I am really starting to get nervous. I am not nervous about the care for him, I'm more nervous about things like sleeping together. Does anyone know we are going to have to have a hospital bed for when he gets home? I havent talked to the staff at the hospital about it yet ( I have to stay home during the week to work and only get to visit on the weekends). Does anyone here sleep in the same bed as their spouse? It's something that me and him pretty much looked forward to snuggling every night.
Also, what kind of things should I be getting to prepare our house? Like lots of towels? extra blankets? etc.

[cubanito_016]

When he gets home have sex with him it will make him feel good.When he gets home if he is a quad prepae yourself for a part time job.Your gona need towel and blankket.Its gona be hard for him but he is gona have to get hand of it some how.But good luck with your part time job when he gets home.

[kdenon01]

My hubby and I have slept together since he came home from the hospital. It was one of the things I missed sooo much while he was in the hospital. I would just make sure you have a phone number of someone to call if you have any questions/concerns. I know we worried a lot in the beginning. Also if you have an questions you can always get on here and ask away!

Congrats! You guys made it through the hospital stay!!!

[nomis]

This is a big deal with your man coming home, jessesgirl511.You've got to talk to the rehab staff and get the full picture and info and co-operation from them. In our part of the world that'd mean talking to the Occupational Therapist and Nursing staff. I can't see why you can't share a bed but you'll have to sort that out for yourselves according to the circumstances. Good luck.

[Ches]

Does he get to come home and visit for a weekend before discharge? Lots of doctors will recommend taking him to la casa and checking out the flow of things in preparation of the big day. Its pretty difficult to list all the little things that will need to be adjusted to suit his new lifestyle, most of that will get brought up over time, as he begins to re-adjust so will his comforts of home.

[newwife08]

Being the wife of a quad, I can tell you that sleeping in the same bed together will be great for your relationship! Just being able to reach out and touch the other is wonderful. Especially after you haven't done it for a while. Like nomis said, check and make sure it's ok first....but I can't see any reason why it wouldn't be. Ches idea about doing a home visit before actually coming home will help lots too. There are going to be lots of obsticles around the house that you have never thought about. Anything on the floor is huge. Rugs are difficult for my hubby to get around. We ended up buying industrial rugs at a home improvement store to help with the snow/water. Those seem to be the only ones that don't get caught up in his chair. As for towels and blankets, extras always come in handy. Ask him what it is that he wants/needs.
He may not know at first, but in time you'll figure out what you both need. Just remember that it will take time......and patience!
Good luck to you both!
Meg

[JesseB]

Yep, going home on weekend trips before discharge will help you guys tons.
You can figure out if you still need to learn any last minute things in PT/OT.

I went on 3 or 4 weekend passes. They helped a bunch, deffinitally recomend trying to get some.

[qbounce]

I sleep in the same bed as I did before the SCI. Just got rid of the box spring to lower the bed to my chair height, making getting in/ out of the chair easier.

There are MANY factors that need to be looked at, especially for higher level quads. I'm sure you'll be able to work things out, though.

btw, I wish I was able to go home for some trial runs before I got discharged, man who would have thought I was in a specialized SCI hospital?!

[Fairygirl72]

I remember how terrified I was when my husband came home from the hospital. He couldn't even sit in a chair yet so he was brought home on a gurney and went straight to his hospital bed. It took 8 months but finally we got him in our bed and it's been the best thing. Our bed is so much better for him than the hard crappy hospital bed. I can't believe that some of you got a trial run to test things out!!! A lot of what is going to happen is going to be by trying things out....you'll figure it out! Good luck! And like it was said above keep a number near by for questions!

[Jessesgirl511]

Thank you all for your advise, unfortunatly we were never given the option of coming home for a "trial". Might be because we live 3 hours away from the hospital he is at. I'm not really too sure. But he is coming home 2/19. I'm so excited but so nervous. He is going to have to come home with a hospital bed but he said he really doesnt want to use it and wants to try to sleep with me. So we will see how that works out. Its all going to be so new. I'll keep you updated!

[qbounce]

Jessesgirl, As previously stated, I sleep on the same bed as before injury. I too came home with a hospital bed, but I hated it. So, I opted to do a couple easy modifications to my previous bed. The only things I changed to do this were:

1. Taking out the box spring to lower the bed to wheelchair level for easier transfers.
2. Adding a memory foam matress pad (2" thick pad that sits atop the matress).

[sbrown955]

One thing I came up with (for daughter, not spouse) was to make the bed with several layers--waterproof mattress pad, sheet, mattress pad, sheet, etc. That way, if there were accidents in the night, she could just tear off one layer and I didn't have to get up to change the sheets. I'm her mom and so don't routinely sleep with her, but I have when she has bad dreams and I can snuggle with her just like I did with her older sisters. I bought her a wonderful bed--temper-pedic knock-ff mattress on an adjustable base that operates with a remote. I like to nap there, it is so wonderful.
Susan