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[Twana]

Hello,

We are looking for a live in Caregiver for spouse. He is 6'4" 240 lbs and has been quad for 3 years c-3/c-7 incomplete. I can no longer mentally or physically take care of him. We have discussed going to a nursing home but we want to try every option availabe before we do this. I don't want Jim to go to a nursing home but I can no longer continue to be the main caregiver. We don't have alot of money, we have paid for care M-F 8am to 5pm out of our own pockets so that I can work full time as manager of a large apt. complex. This gives us free rent at a beautiful handicap apt. and enough money to pay for the caregiver. I feel as if I am crashing and take meds just to get through each day. Some days I really lose it and feel like I am losing my mind. (can't thnk straight, chest hurts alot etc.) We don't know what to ask for in a live in caregiver, what to expect, how much to pay, rules of the home etc. If anyone has experienced this please help us with some direction. I'm almost ready to give up. Jim has one son who lives in Texas, we live in Oklaoma and the rest of his family live in Kentucky. I am all alone with this. His son wants to move him to Kentucky and put him in a nursing facility. Jim has alot or relatives and family in Kentucky.

Twana

Edited by Twana, 22 March 2009 - 04:40 PM.

[sbrown955]

You do sound at the end of your rope. Is there any possibility of moving to Kentucky so that extended family could do part of Jim's care? Is his the sort of family that would do that?
I'm in the process of trying to find a spot as live-in caregiver where I could have my daughter with me (T9, age 18 TODAY!!!). I haven't had experience as a live-in caregiver except for my daughter (and for my parents when they've been ill or post-op), but do have some ideas as to what I expect if I am lucky enough to find a spot in my area. I would expect a private room that had a comfortable chair and a tv, in addition to the usual bedroom things, so that I could relax in privacy. A private bath would be wonderful but I don't expect one. I would expect full use of the kitchen with the proviso that I clean up after myself.
Financially, usually live-in caregivers get a stipend. What I've seen in ads on craigslist are amounts ranging from $200 to $500 a week, depending on the level of care necessary, or rates of $10 to $12 an hour for those who need less assistance.
As far as getting some unpaid help--could you try contacting the local Boy or Girl Scouts, or local churches with youth groups, to see if you could find volunteers to come in to spend some time with Jim while you took a nap in another room?