12 replies to this topic

[javtenor]

Hi, My name is Javier and i'm from Colombia. In this moment I'm doing doctoral studies in USA. My girlfriend suffered an accident this week, in Chile. She has a complete spinal injury. According with the doctors she is paraplegic now, she cannot feel her legs. This is a very hard situation for us, you know that. I love her, I want to marry with her. But I don't know how to deal with the situation. I want to prepare myself to take care for her. I want to know how to give support to her. I feel so incompetent. Whatever word of advice will be welcome. Thanks

[kim wright]

javtenor, on Sep 18 2009, 07:02 PM, said:

Hi, My name is Javier and i'm from Colombia. In this moment I'm doing doctoral studies in USA. My girlfriend suffered an accident this week, in Chile. She has a complete spinal injury. According with the doctors she is paraplegic now, she cannot feel her legs. This is a very hard situation for us, you know that. I love her, I want to marry with her. But I don't know how to deal with the situation. I want to prepare myself to take care for her. I want to know how to give support to her. I feel so incompetent. Whatever word of advice will be welcome. Thanks

take one day at a time . both of you need to adjust to your new situation. you never said what level. just keep talking . it will be hard for both of you but you need to know that if you have a spinal cord injury life does not end. you can still do what you did before but perhaps a different way .

[FROG]

OK... I see you put t-1 injury in your info. Pretty high up but still has shoulders and arms. This is tramatic times but trust what kim said. You can work through it. there is much support on this site. Stay with us and you will be blessed and you will learn much. My prayers are with you and your girlfriend. David

[qbounce]

Even at that level she could, in time, build up enough strength to be very independant. Time, patience and love will carry you through this.

[javtenor]

FROG, on Sep 18 2009, 03:45 PM, said:

OK... I see you put t-1 injury in your info. Pretty high up but still has shoulders and arms. This is tramatic times but trust what kim said. You can work through it. there is much support on this site. Stay with us and you will be blessed and you will learn much. My prayers are with you and your girlfriend. David

Thanks. You are right in regard of the level of the injury. She is t-7. I just begin to learn about nomenclature. She feels dizzy most of the time. When her legs are massaged they move, but she cannot feel them. What is the explanation for this?
Can you recommend me a book, a place where i can go to learn more?
I appreciate all help that you can give me

(i apologize for my rudimentary english)

qbounce, on Sep 19 2009, 12:50 PM, said:

Even at that level she could, in time, build up enough strength to be very independant. Time, patience and love will carry you through this.

Thanks for your words of support.

[qbounce]

Because her legs are moving, do you have a facility that offers therapy to build strength in her legs? Because the SCI is still new, her spine is swollen at injury site, and will ease off within the next few months.

During this time, you may see changes in her ability to move/ feel more, so make sure she continues her therapy if at all possible. And also, make sure her legs are stretched daily to keep her range of motion (ROM) in tact!--very important

To help with dizzyness, wrap her legs with either ace bandages (not to tight), or use 'ted hose' to help with circulation while her body readjusts itself. Also, for now it could help to get an 'abdominal binder' --a girdle-like velcro wrap that fits snugly around her stomache area, to also aid in her blood circulation.

There are many more threads or informative info here on the site to answer more of your concerns.
Best wishes.

[javtenor]

I really thank you.

[Karl187]

I and my family found this book to offer some decent advice:

http://www.amazon.co...v...9108&sr=1-1

When your girlfriends legs are massaged, whereabouts does it happen and where do the legs move? I find if you touch or rub a certain part of my foot it activates a reflex that moves the toes. The movment could be a reflex reaction to stimulation.

And the advice about TED stockings (basically DVT socks) and abdominal binders is sound regarding blood circulation, they will help.

Good luck.

[javtenor]

Thanks Karl for the advice. I got the book this week.
My girlfriend is waiting for another surgery. She suffered a fracture of the sternum. I hope that the surgery will be made tomorrow.
Thanks again

Karl187, on Sep 22 2009, 07:35 AM, said:

I and my family found this book to offer some decent advice:

http://www.amazon.co...v...9108&sr=1-1

When your girlfriends legs are massaged, whereabouts does it happen and where do the legs move? I find if you touch or rub a certain part of my foot it activates a reflex that moves the toes. The movment could be a reflex reaction to stimulation.

And the advice about TED stockings (basically DVT socks) and abdominal binders is sound regarding blood circulation, they will help.

Good luck.

[Ches]

Poor thing, i wish her the best. Qbounce is right on with the info. Does your girlfried reside in Chili? Hows the healthcare, if so?

Broken sternums are a nightmare to deal with. I broke mine in two places, along w/ 11 true ribs, that was by far more pain than a broken back. And those dizzy spells will pretty much keep happening until that bone is good, healed and stretched. The things Qbounce mentioned will all help with it though!

Hang in there, both of you,.. it will get better.

[Tetracyclone]

Javier,

Lo siento mucho la mala suerte que sufre su novia. Espero que algunas palabras en Español sean un consuelo. Pues, mi Español es muy basico. Yo soy C-5-7, incomplete, y estoy casada. El apoyo que ofrerció mi esposo era la medicina mas fuerte que recibí despues del accidente.

Nunca se rindan.

Pwuff

[Tetracyclone]

Javier,

Otra cosa- no haga promesas. Hay que aprender, poco a poco, la realidad nueva de su novia antes de que pueda decidir si tengas la voluntad y capacidad para cometer a una vida con una persona descapacitada. Ten paciencia con ti mismo y con ella.

[javtenor]

Muchas gracias por tus palabras Pwuff
Yo generalmente nunca hago promesas, pero dificilmente pueda yo vivir sin mi conejito.
Paciencia, esa es la palabra clave.
Gracias de nuevo

Pwuff, on Oct 8 2009, 09:47 PM, said:

Javier,

Otra cosa- no haga promesas. Hay que aprender, poco a poco, la realidad nueva de su novia antes de que pueda decidir si tengas la voluntad y capacidad para cometer a una vida con una persona descapacitada. Ten paciencia con ti mismo y con ella.