[Skrads]

I know this subject has been discussed in another forum, but I would like to get the views from ABs. I would like to find out what able-bodied people (especially those with a close relation to someone else with a disability) think of other able-bodies getting into the wheelchair someone with a disability.

I do not mind my mates getting into my wheelchair. I actually encourage them to use it. They need to see what my point of view is like. Even when I meet people I invite them to have a go.

There have been a few times but when we are out in public, (pub, club, house party etc.) and I get onto a couch. My mates get into the chair and go for a wonder. Almost every time they do this but they end up getting abused by someone about being in the chair. There have also been times the staff at a particular bar tells my mates to get out of it because it is dangerous. How it is dangerous for them but not me still confuses me.

By the time I find out what has happened, I have been unable to approach the people complaining about my mates being in the wheelchair.

So based on this, my mates and I want to get an idea of what upsets able-bodied people about having a non-disabled person being in a wheelchair and why they never have the guts to approach me about my mates being in my wheelchair.

[Zak Sharp]

I agree man, it's never bothered me.

[Hikkakaru]

Usually late at night if a friend and I go buy vodka or whatever at a grocery store i'll hop into one of those store-provided electric scooters and give my friend my chair (I take the chair whenever there is extended distance involved). They have a blast usually, but I am always afraid because my chair is super tippy, and whilst I am used to it a friend of mine has fallen backwards trying to be cute a few times.

We get a few stares, I think mostly because of our age. Young kid in a wheelchair = 'Jackass' wannabe stunt kids to the public's eye most of the time I think. It doesn't help that I usually ram my friends with the scooter whenever given the chance either, though.

-Sam

[snowqueeneh]

Paul is still in rehab 2 days a week. He is in a power chair but we take his manual with us for practice. I ride it the whole time were there. It has really given me a good idea of some of the difficulties he has. People treat me very different too when I'm in his chair. I always worry that the other quads/ paras will be offended by me. But I don't care because Paul and I have so much fun. We race down the halls... and he likes to watch me when I have difficulty doing something. It's too bad people (AB's) can be so narrow minded at times. And so far, no one has said anything to us about our fun.

[ems]

I dont mind ppl sitting in my chair, as long as i'm not still sat in it ;) most of my friends will jsut turn it round and plonk themselves in it.. its never bothered me atall.

[Trinity]

I am not at all bothered by people sitting in my chair and have never had problems with anyone else thinking it's 'inappropriate', well not that I know of anyway. Plus I would rather someone sat in my chair than make me relinquish my spot on the sofa and once sat in it then few people can resist the lure of trying a wheelie however my chair is tippy and many of my friends learned this the hard way!

[knightrider]

I've never had a problem with friends using my chair when im not using it, and not had many people complain, just more like laugh when they fall out which happens everytime. The only thing that bothers me is when im out and someone has taken it for a spin, they are never to be seen when i really need a piss.

This post has been edited by knightrider: 12 November 2009 - 05:41 PM

[chickadee]

The only time I get pissy is when they're doing stupid shit in my living room or dining room. Two things:

1. I have a tippy chair as well, and don't feel like having folks sueing me for head injuries or whatnots when they inevitably tip backwards.
2. I have super nice furniture that I'm proud to say I haven't bumped into once. I also want my nice TV to stay intact.

If you want to screw around, go out in the backyard and mess with it. Otherwise, don't do it in my house! I feel like an old hermit man. DAMMIT YOU KIDS!

[qbounce]

Depends on the situation. But if it's a REALLY big person then I'll have to say, "sorry, but there's no way in HELL your getting in my ride!" I'd fear they might get stuck, or blow my tires out (and I have the kick/ solid type). Maybe bow the back support or break my clothing guard . . . who knows what could go wrong?

Let's face it. These things aren't cheap. And, anything needing repairs is gonna cost ME. Not to mention, the only back up chair I have is the big clunker hospital fold-in-half kind. And it takes me 10 minutes just to get from my bed to the kitchen in that old piece of junk.

In order to prevent any problematic issues that may arise, I try to prevent any situation all together by explaining how my wc was fitted specifically for my height/ weight/ and ass size . . . . and it took me 6 months to get. So, I'd rather not have your biped able- walkin'-ass, sittin' in my stinky, haven't-washed-the-cushion-in-over-a-month, but only "I" know it, wheel chair!

[chickadee]

qbounce, on Nov 12 2009, 12:07 PM, said:

So, I'd rather not have your biped able- walkin'-ass, sittin' in my stinky, haven't-washed-the-cushion-in-over-a-month, but only "I" know it, wheel chair!

Mmmmm, butt crusty. How enticing.

[The Black Sheep]

Back in 11th grade, we had a class field trip to a skating rink and I moved from my chair to one of the table booths. A few people took it for a twirl and we got a couple of those same looks. The teachers in particular didn't want to other 'kids' fooling around, and they did flip over a couple times doing a wheely. I honestly don't care and I found it hysterical, but I can also see where people are worried about them misusing it and flipping over backwards or something.

Nobody has a sense of humor anymore! Even if someone was fooling around in a chair but didn't need it, they're not hurting anyone, but "fun" is frowned upon in public I guess. You have to be uber-conscious about offending people now-a-days.

I wish more people would play around in my chair, actually, just to see the different perspective. It's fun to play in it, but they also realize how inconvenient it can be also. The friends at the skating rink kept bumping into tables and chairs, and they wouldn't have otherwise seen how tough it can be to get through crowded places... and how high those counters are.

[ClaraTaylor]

It's easy...

Cripples are not meant to have FUN, not meant to be happy, not meant to do silly things.

Therefore anyone who so much as giggles when they pass wind should be put on more drugs to keep them content and quiet.

[qbounce]

chickadee, on Nov 12 2009, 11:15 AM, said:

qbounce, on Nov 12 2009, 12:07 PM, said:

So, I'd rather not have your biped able- walkin'-ass, sittin' in my stinky, haven't-washed-the-cushion-in-over-a-month, but only "I" know it, wheel chair!

Mmmmm, butt crusty. How enticing.

[allis53ca]

i have to roll with Q on this one....no big deal, as long as the deal isn't your obese ass...on my sling under my cushion (which isnt shared, ever) my daughter wrote "no wide or over sized loads" with silver marker

[ItaG]

Since you post the question to AB, I will reply! ^^

To be honest, despite knowing my friend for nearly 30 years I have not used her wheelchair even once. When we were little, of course I was very curious... but my mother hammered in my head that it was not a toy and I should never use it. And I have a vague souvenir that her mother too was very concerned about us using it: as qbounce said they are expensive and adults were in my opinion concerned about what we could do with it.

As we grew older, she has never offered me to try it, and I have never asked. I guess from my point of view the chair is a "part of her body", and I wouldn't feel comfortable in using it.

Thinking about ABs using a wheelchair for fun, I can't clearly give a general answer, but I have to admit it would bother me. I think from an AB perspective the wheelchair is associated to hospital, illnesses, and serious problems in general. I can't see it as something to use as a "toy" to have fun with. It seems a lack of respect to people who need to use it (even if I have just realized on this thread that at least for SCI people is not a problem at all! lol). So I will probably look badly at an AB using it without needing it. Maybe too many bad memories associated with it in my life. ^^

[redryder49]

I sit in my girlfriend's all the time, she is ok with it and it is usually her idea for me to sit in it, when she's not. I coach a wheelchair sports team also and alot of times the AB's will use chairs and play against/with those in chairs.

[ohio4282]

I never had any curiosity about trying out my fiancé's chair. In my case, he was the one who was more interested in seeing what I could (or could not do, as I'm a known klutz). I sit it in often at his house, because basically lives in a studio apartment and has no chairs. So I use it as a piece of furniture often. Beats sitting on the toilet any day.

Anyway, not the point. My fiance got a new chair recently and he hates it. So, some how me using it was going to prove just how much of a pain in the as it was, I guess. But, I'm only 5 feet tall. And he, the last he knows of, is 6'2. My feet couldn't even reach the rests. So, I scooted forward and discovered that I need to have my back against the backrest if I didn't want to push myself forward and out of it all together. And then it became hard for me to reach the wheels in order to move myself forward.

Still isn't totally the point, but it does show it wasn't made for me and I can't really safely use it. And from there, I did okay in a straight line, but if I had to turn or move around something, I hit it. That could be because it was far too big for me, or simply because I really don't have a clue how to drive that baby.

As for why an AB might be upset by it, I can think of two reasons. One, I think most people are so terrified by the thought of being in one themselves and are so blinded by that that they can't see why someone would even be interested in trying...sort of the "not a toy" mentality ItaG mentioned, but with a different thought backing it up.

The other is more personal. I've tried his chair a few times and everything around me was in danger. So, I imagine some people would be in fear of their property, if they saw me trying to get around.

Still, though, if the owner of the chair is okay with it, and the person using it isn't posing a threat to anyone and everything around them, like I am, I don't see the harm in it. Nor do I understand or can offer any explanation as to why any one would. Otherwise, it just sounds like ignorant people saying something that they really probably shouldn't be.

This post has been edited by ohio4282: 13 November 2009 - 01:52 AM

[Skrads]

ItaG, on Nov 13 2009, 11:38 AM, said:

Since you post the question to AB, I will reply! ^^

To be honest, despite knowing my friend for nearly 30 years I have not used her wheelchair even once. When we were little, of course I was very curious... but my mother hammered in my head that it was not a toy and I should never use it. And I have a vague souvenir that her mother too was very concerned about us using it: as qbounce said they are expensive and adults were in my opinion concerned about what we could do with it.

As we grew older, she has never offered me to try it, and I have never asked. I guess from my point of view the chair is a "part of her body", and I wouldn't feel comfortable in using it.

Thinking about ABs using a wheelchair for fun, I can't clearly give a general answer, but I have to admit it would bother me. I think from an AB perspective the wheelchair is associated to hospital, illnesses, and serious problems in general. I can't see it as something to use as a "toy" to have fun with. It seems a lack of respect to people who need to use it (even if I have just realized on this thread that at least for SCI people is not a problem at all! lol). So I will probably look badly at an AB using it without needing it. Maybe too many bad memories associated with it in my life. ^^

It did take a while for my close friends to start using it, and there are still a few that won't get in it even when I offer. You are right in saying that the chair is associated with a lot of negativity. I think getting people into the chair is a great way of changing this stereotype to show people who do not know of anyone in a wheelchair, that a lot are ok with there disability.

This is a big push in Australia at the moment, to try and change the stereotype. A lot of able-bodied wheelchair sport compititions have been starting up to enable all people to participate in wheelchair sports. I myself coach and captian a wheelchair basketball team and I am the only 1 with a disablity. The rest are all friends of mine.

[mzz_e]

Well the only friend I have in a chair cant exactly get out of it so i don't have much experience with it, but my brother and some of his friends stole an old chair that my grandma had around and were using it to go off jumps and race down huge hills so it kinda freaks me out that someones going to get hurt, also when Alex first got his chair(he uses his head to operate it) he had troubles and would run into door ways and stuff so if someone else tried to use it it would probably make me pretty nervouse

[Kwag_Myers]

I think some people are just easily offended. Once I was in a meeting at work and the presenter asked to use my cane momentarily as a pointer. I thought it was clever, but someone else thought is was an offense toward me and complained to my boss.

Also, I think the chair makes some people uncomfortable and they don't know how to deal with it.

[pow76]

ive been heart 13 years and ive heard one main reason AB dosent like to get in wheelchairs is that they think it will be bad luck, that some how they may have a chance of ending up in one

[edlee]

I think Kwag hit it pretty squarely. People who aren't around chair users do have a problem more than those who know us. Then there's the idea of contagion,,,,,, afraid you might "catch it" if you sit in my chair.

The only problem I have is of expense and breakage. Not even expense,, as my insurance pays anyway,,, but imagine,, if your friend does something wrong,, and breaks a caster or a,,, god forbid,, frame,, making the chair unusable. How do you get home,,, do you have a spare??? How long before you can get someone out to look at it let alone fix it???

If they break it,, I'm sure they will say they are sorry and offer to pay for it,,,, until they find out how expensive these suckers are. Would be sad to lose a friend over it.

As for others being upset,,,, screw'em,, it's your chair.
ed

[blue eyes]

i jump in my boyfriends chair occasionally. he doesn't care. i mostly get in it when he's in his stander so it's kinda like we switch views! i think some snotty ass AB people probably bitch because they think the minute another AB guy is in the chair f*@king off then they are going to do something stupid and hurt themselves or break something around them. i can't think of any other reason...