22 replies to this topic

[Myssa]

Since Brady was hurt we've got a ton of negative reactions to the fact we still let Brayden and Jazmine ride their dirt bikes. At first it didn't bother me, I just ignored it but it's got me thinking. I know if something is going to happen it's going to happen but I can't stop thinking what i'd do if the kids got really hurt. I can't amagin them going threw that but I know if we were to take riding from them it would take a big part of who they are they ride 7 days a week no matter rain or shine. We live on 20 acres that is pretty much devoted to riding, some being cleared for them to work on their jumps and some is trails for them to ride on. All they talk about is becoming pro riders, they are such adrenaline junkies (just like Brady).

I thought i'd post this to get a little adivce, would you make you're kids stop riding?

Sorry for the rant, I think I needed to vent a little.

Edited by Myssa, 15 January 2010 - 06:40 PM.

[Courtney]

No, I wouldn't.....I'm sure it would make me a nervous wreck, but if your children love it and it's part of who they are, why on earth would anyone want to take that from them. Duke was in a single car accident on the way to work one morning, but that doesn't stop me from driving nor does it make me want to keep my children from driving. You don't have to be upset at people for wondering why, but you can matter of factly state that it's part of who they are and that they love it. Case closed. Most quads/Paras I'd say are injured from a car wreck, motorcycly/ATV accident, or swimmimg accident.....that doesnt mean that everyone in that persons family stops swimming, driving, or riding as the case may be.....however at this point, I'm sure that you two are sick of hearing it...so put your foot down firmly to those who keep bugging you about it (I had to learn quickly not to worry about stepping on everyones toes once my husband was injured, I had to stand up for him when he couldn't because of all the adjustments he was going through) and I had to learn to stand up for myself

[Tinbasher]

I think if they understand the risks, ride within their skills and wear what protection is appropriate then you can do no more. Stopping them riding won't gaurantee their safety. Bird watchers get eaten by bears, fishermen drown, woodworkers end up they can't count to ten on their hands and those who cuddle up on the couch because it's safe have a heart attack at 50

Not doing stuff that make you feel alive won't make you live forever. It will only FEEL that way

Tin

[gordonr]

Myssa, on Jan 15 2010, 06:37 PM, said:

I thought i'd post this to get a little adivce, would you make you're kids stop riding?

How old are these kids?

-G

[Zoo]

As a previous BMX, MX, ATV, and Streetbike enthusiast I would never take back my years of riding, racing, and fun... Was the most memorable years of my life.. Its been 4 yrs now since my motorcyle accident and I still go to MX races and still get goosebumps when I pass a Motorcycle on the road. My advice to my friends that ride is KEEP RIDING......

[SandieT]

You can't wrap children in cotton wool, you've got to let them go. All you can do is make them aware of all the risks of what might happen (and I'm sure yours do.) and make sure they wear all the safety equipment etc. If you don't let them ride around your own home where you can keep an eye on them then they will only do it at friends, and maybe take greater risks.

[greybeard]

SandieT, on Jan 15 2010, 10:48 PM, said:

You can't wrap children in cotton wool, you've got to let them go. All you can do is make them aware of all the risks of what might happen (and I'm sure yours do.) and make sure they wear all the safety equipment etc. If you don't let them ride around your own home where you can keep an eye on them then they will only do it at friends, and maybe take greater risks.

Agreed.

[Tetracyclone]

Myssa,

You could have forbidden it after the accident only if your family culture were not so imbedded in riding. As others have said, to do it now would cause damage, and perhaps accidents, instead of keeping them safe. You can add to the family culture an ever deepening concern for safety with regular discussions of what to do in different situations.

Cam Brady take the lead with questions, guidelines, and the like, especially making sure they learn to recognize when they are fatigued. Most shit happens when people are tired or hungry.

You can also turn them on to the way professional teams address safety concerns, and how seriously they take it. F-1, in particular, and auto racing in general is practically obsessed with safety, and as a result has reduced injuries remarkably. Let them know that professional teams and sponsors actively look for riders who are extremely disciplined about safety regulations.

Edited by Tetracyclone, 16 January 2010 - 12:10 AM.

[Myssa]

gordonr, on Jan 15 2010, 04:57 PM, said:

Myssa, on Jan 15 2010, 06:37 PM, said:

I thought i'd post this to get a little adivce, would you make you're kids stop riding?

How old are these kids?

-G

Brayden is 10 and Jazmine is 6, both Birthday's are December 25th

[Travelling Blackbird]

No, you're not nuts. Let them ride. As has already been said, you can't wrap them in cotton wool. It sounds like they're wearing the right gear, and playing on a dedicated terrain, and enjoying their childhoods.

As a teacher, I know that banning things only makes it more likely that the kids will go out and do those things!

Anyone who's criticizing you and making negative comments is just showing their lack of understanding of the situation, and being unsupportive of you.

It's good that you vented. That's what we're here for, right?

[Doug]

As a fallen rider I can say that there is no way I would stop my children from riding. I'm just glad I got hurt doing something I loved because there are so many people that get hurt doing nothing even remotly dangerous. I do reccomend the new neck guards for riding it will help.

As for the other people and their comments simply say "its what they love"

[Myssa]

Doug, on Jan 15 2010, 08:45 PM, said:

As a fallen rider I can say that there is no way I would stop my children from riding. I'm just glad I got hurt doing something I loved because there are so many people that get hurt doing nothing even remotly dangerous. I do reccomend the new neck guards for riding it will help.

As for the other people and their comments simply say "its what they love"

Brady say's the same thing you did pretty much. He's glad if he had to get hurt he was having fun when doing it and wouldn't give up the years he spent riding. The kids do both now wear neck guards, it helps me breath a little better.

Edited by Myssa, 16 January 2010 - 03:34 AM.

[Andrew Meddings]

when i was in hospital after crashing my bike my wife sold my 5yr old boys bike. she said he was never to ride again. i tried getting him into go karts but he much prefered bikes. at the go kart track the also have pocket bikes so i got him one of them . its like a toy not a real motor bike . then he got a chinese thumpster still not a real bike. then my nephew lent him a moto x l bike. then he bought one. my wife never asks him anything about riding. he is a little bit more carefull than me which is a good thing. riding is dangerous but i dout anyone who has injured themselves on a bike wishes they had not ridden a bike . he will be getting his licence soon & is talking about getting a bike for the road . mum has forbidden it. watch this space
cheers andrew

[dangerousdave]

I don't believe in discrimination of any sort
So I would never say "this happened to me so you can't do it"

But,... this is a possibility, so are you being safer then I was
Would be a fair comment

Edited by dangerousdave, 16 January 2010 - 12:05 PM.

[Maltese Cat]

Tetracyclone, on Jan 16 2010, 12:05 AM, said:

Myssa,

especially making sure they learn to recognize when they are fatigued. Most shit happens when people are tired or hungry.

Best advice in the world. For any sport or any adrenaline-junkie activity.

My boyfriend was injured crossing the road. Probably statistically one of the most dangerous activities we'll do. Surprisingly, I don't try to stop anyone crossing the road!

Its the whole loved and lost, or never loved at all argument in a different format. I suspect your kids understand better than anyone the risks involved. They live with the consequences every day. Your kids are young, but they are old enough to understand what they are doing.

my dad is a headmaster of a girl's boarding school. He sees lots of other schools stopping rugby, school trips, adventure trips, all quoting "health and safety".He takes his girls (aged 7-16) canoeing, rock climbing, abseiling, camping under bashers in the woods, etc etc. His view is that it is his duty to teach these girls how to handle risk, and how to understand the dangers of the outside world, not by protecting them from it, but by exposing them to it, and then showing them how best to deal with it. That way, when they get thrown out into the big wide world when the are deemed grown up enough, then they know what they are capable of, and are less likely to kill themselves doing something they are not prepared for, or not sufficently trained to do.

It sounds like your kids are getting a great education in how to handle risk.

[mitch]

kids have too do what they like, cant quit every thing. my only son choose to sell his snowmobile and racing four wheeler just to be safe and to be here to help me when needed

[S&W Winger]

I agree with most of the above replies to just let them enjoy!! Only with even more gusto!!!! They have a passion and to deny it would be crushing...as long as they keep within their limits, etc., as all the others have suggested above... Life happens at it will...


I would let my kids ride...and when people tell me that I am crazy to plan on riding a Gold Wing (streetbike) again after my accident, I tell them that they are the crazy ones (no sense arguing with the senseless! )!

People cannot understand passion if they lack their own...

I would rather die doing what I Love, then Live a Life of Death, hiding from Life in some cave, just waiting to die (anyway)...

Edited by S&W Winger, 17 January 2010 - 12:48 AM.

[ericr]

I agree with everyone let them have fun. growing up i surfed, snowboarded, played hockey, football and raced dirt bikes and diving off a boat got me at 31. my point is it can just happen doing the littlest thing cant live in bubble and i wouldnt change anything i have ever done, im glad my parents let me do crazy things at least i had some fun times.

[dangerousdave]

Crazy things - when as a young AB playing hideouts
I scrambled up a old lightning struck hollow tree and jumped into the hollow to hide
Yep I won - nobody found me - nor could they here my cries for help
Still don't know how I climbed out - to be run over in later life by white van man

[Ratticis]

Hell no I wouldn't restrict what my kids do because something bad might happen. Something good might happen too, like they become pro riders. So why deprive them chances for sucess by attempting to protect them from failure? I got my first bike at the age of 4. Could ride it before i could ride a peddle bike. Little 50cc Yamaha. I wiped out a few times, burnt my self on the exaust as the result of wet grass, a gopher hole, wearing shorts and a tshirt (no shoes, no helmet, hillbilly biking ) and jumping the sandbox. Went to the house, cleaned up the blood, and tried again 10 mins later. Amd by that time i had been driving solo for about a year and running lots of equipment (loaders, tractors, skidsteers, ect) for about 2. Ahh the joys of being a farm kid. Then I go and slip in the shower 18 years later. Who knew?
Anyways, where was I going with this? O ya, enjoy life and be sure the dangers are known to your kids (which i'm sure they do know, especially now)

[Myssa]

Ratticis, on Jan 17 2010, 08:14 PM, said:

Hell no I wouldn't restrict what my kids do because something bad might happen. Something good might happen too, like they become pro riders. So why deprive them chances for sucess by attempting to protect them from failure? I got my first bike at the age of 4. Could ride it before i could ride a peddle bike. Little 50cc Yamaha. I wiped out a few times, burnt my self on the exaust as the result of wet grass, a gopher hole, wearing shorts and a tshirt (no shoes, no helmet, hillbilly biking ) and jumping the sandbox. Went to the house, cleaned up the blood, and tried again 10 mins later. Amd by that time i had been driving solo for about a year and running lots of equipment (loaders, tractors, skidsteers, ect) for about 2. Ahh the joys of being a farm kid. Then I go and slip in the shower 18 years later. Who knew?
Anyways, where was I going with this? O ya, enjoy life and be sure the dangers are known to your kids (which i'm sure they do know, especially now)

Yes the kids do the know the dangers, they saw Brady's get hurt. Both Brayden and Jazmine started riding at 3 with training wheels, now they both ride better then I can on my best day( they don't have fear like me) You are very right with the joys of being a farm kid, we only have 2 ponies but I wouldn't change letting my kids grow up with space to run and have fun. Brady and I grew up in Atlantic City, to think I cried like a baby when we moved from there.

[MxDisasterGrl]

Rattics, you fell in the shower????!! OMGosh, i can't imagine.

As far as my opinion, honestly, i believe mine is a bit different. Lets all cut the crap for just a minute, if you could save your kids from going through what you yourself/partner have gone through, wouldn't you? I have a 5 yr. old son, and a 7 yr. old daughter. My accident was due to my lack of experience, i know that, and i live with that everyday. However, david bailey and many other highly experienced riders that knew exactly what they were doing crashed and have been left paralyzed. Now some positive people (usually like myself) would say, "well it's better than being dead.", "It could have been worse.". I say that to my children to cover what i'm really thinking at the time. Which is usually, "really? could it be? I'd rather have died that day in the sun....". Only for my children's sake do i ever thank God for not ending my life that day. So cutting the crap, i'm just saying. Do i let my son and daughter also ride because they want to? Will i let them get drunk and crazy, or high and stupid in front of me, just because it's fun and they like it???? Hmmm...I think not. Will they possibly hate me for it later in life, or a lot right now? Possibly. But will it kill them not to ride? No. Fortunately my kids have not started riding, so honestly it's a different situation. My kids wouldn't really know what they're missing. But my boyfriend has been racing and riding since he was very young, and we both like watching it and riding ourselves. He wants to get my son started this summer. I am also fighting the dilemna in my own head right now. I just dont' know what to do. It's easier for someone else to say, "hey, sure, let 'em ride. Crossing the street is just as dangerous." I actually had a very good friend of my own killed from simply crossing the street, he was drunk, but still just crossing the street to his apartment on LSU campus.

It's a very indifferent feeling you have, i know. My son is soooo clumsy, i just don't know. My daughter is more like me, and over thinks things. You DON'T know what may happen to your loved ones, and if you make them stop doing what you consider too much a risk, and nothing bad happens to them; you will never know if it's because you stopped racing/riding, or if it was never going to happen in the first place. While they're kids it may be your decision, but when they get older it will have to be their own to make. They may know what it's like to "watch" their dad go through life paralyzed, but to know how it actually feels to go through life themselves like that, i beg to differ, they may not. Our kids don't make rational decisions as well as us, that's why it's parenting.

With all that being said, i DO agree with the statements that, if it did have to happen i'm happy it happened doing something i loved, and doing something cool. At least i have a cool story to tell. But i would have given all the bikes up in the whole world to just get one more day of playing outside w/ my kids again. Or standing up, with them running into my arms and swinging them around. I miss that more. They're young and have sooo much to offer other than moto/supercross.

But still i want their happiness, and still I DON'T want to be the one person that has the weight on my shoulders to say NO to them doing something they love so much. But what can you and everyone else expect? Once you're living it, it always changes. I was just talking about all of this because my bf and i were watching james stewart wreck. And i thought for sure he was injured pretty bad. He got back on hurt and all, but i swear a sharp pain shot right up through my spine when i watched the replay. Same w/ football sometimes. And those are the two things my son wants to do, just like his mom, football and supercross!!

Since we can't all see the future, we'll never know the right answer, but my kids are all i have, and if they did get hurt, mom couldn't help them like they would need, so i just don't know what to do either.

I"m sorry this was so long, obviously it's a passionate question for me as well. Good luck w/ your kids decision, either way. I hope they become pros and i see them on TV!!!!

Sincerely,
april

[AussieBrad]

April, I agree with your statement about "at least your not dead" I wish that sometimes i had died on that day too especially when the pain gets to bad.
My 9yr son is the reason I bought a dirtbike and now look at me..T4 complete..
He has a dirtbike sitting in the shed,has he ridden since my accident? NO!!
But if he decides to ride it then thats up too him..Nervous oh Yes...
He knows and understands what happened to me and as someone said before We can't wrap our children up in cotton wool...
Who knows what if anything is going to happen to us.

When I was 27 I was a pedestrian hit by a car as I walked across the road. I was lucky in the sense I saw the car out of the corner of my eye so was able to throw my body backwards. Still I hit the car and was thrown in the air past the drivers window landing 20 meters down the road. One compound fracture of the tibia and fibia of the lower left leg. 4months in hospital,2yrs of physio and 7 operations.

Now I did not expect that,but thought surely that was my 1 life threatening event.

Edited by AussieBrad, 13 July 2010 - 09:39 AM.