[Myssa]

I was wondering how much other parents tell their kids about things they have to deal with since their injury. We haven't told our kids a whole lot about Brady's care, I do most of it after their in bed or gone for school. Our son Brayden does know a little more then Jazmine but not a whole lot, they haven't asked. I know they are just happy to have their Daddy home and happy.

I know in time and as they get older questions will come up and I would like to be somewhat ready. How have you explained things to you're kids?

[mcferguson]

We have a 5, 3, and infant, and we haven't kept anything from them. They've seen me cath, shower, and know that I have a 'bathroom day' (they don't know the details of the routine, just that I have to sit there a while). It was all very novel for them for about three months, but then became normal.

We explained that daddy has a broken back from the car accident and things don't work normally anymore. I tell them that my brain can't talk to my body like it used to, so I have to do things different. That level of answer seems to have satisfied them for now.

[Tinbasher]

I think it depends how old they are and what they ask. They do ask some fascinating questions that show they really think about things deeper than we realise.

I remember my godson who must have been 6 or 7 asking me "Do your legs hurt Uncle Tom?" I said that no they didn't and he thought for a while and replied "Thats good I was so worried that they hurted all the time".

It was all I could do not to blub !

Tin

[ericr]

I dont have kids but I have 3 nieces and 3 nephews 2 of which are twin 5 yr olds the rest are 9 and older. however the twins really learned alot about my accident even discussing it in school. I dont know if they really believe that it can be permanent. They dont know about the care that is involved but they are always pushing me around, helping get out of bed and repositioning pillows. i would assume its like anything they will just learn over time.

[Courtney]

Duke and Abbi know almost everything. We've explained the injury in detail. They know about catherization. They know that daddy has to transfer onto a different chair to go "poo", but they don't know any details about that. We've been pretty up front about everything. They understand alot more than you realize....

[tyvin]

Let the kids be kids and if they ask questions answer with age appropriate replies. My now 12 year old son just wanted to know if it hurt and other then that I catch him looking at me sometimes to see if I'm in pain but we're all good.

[greybeard]

No matter what you've told your kids, it's almost certain they'll know a whole lot more than you think. After all, they are programmed to watch, listen and learn and they're damned good at it.

[dangerousdave]

One day when I was bagged - I was by a tree and releasing the tap and urinating
Up came a little boy - what you doing - having a pee I said
Oh he said, inquisitivly looking, then off he wandered to play with his friends
Whatever questions they ask - just tell em the truth

[jennyau]

My five year old grandson walked in on me cathing and came right up to look ,as I was midstream I couldnt stop the process quick enough and he just yelled out to my daughter that grandma was peeing like a boy.My daughter explained why and we left it like that and never made a big deal out of it,I always found with my own children growing up that they would come up against things like how is mum going to get that baby out{my daughter at 3 yrs old asked me when the dr was going to put a zipper in my belly and get the baby out}they problem solve suited to their age and we would just not make a big deal out of things and only explained things in a way that was age apropriate.My other grandson recently told me when 2 women love eachother they are called lepricorns and he had an attitude of gee grandma dont you know anything{the things they learn in the playground] its lovely that your kids are happy and secure just knowing daddy is at home with them and are just going on with things.I grew up with my mum having polio and to me as a child I never asked to much I was always just aware that she did things differently.She was my Mum and made our childhood magic it wasnt until I was older I realised that she struggled with life but never put any stress on us kids now that she is elderly its my turn to give her some of that magic back.

Jenny

This post has been edited by jennyau: 29 August 2010 - 03:42 PM

[mellowgator]

hi myssa,

i guess you could say my daughters have seen it all. i always felt blessed that i have girls especially when i have to pull over in my van to cath. they have been around when i've had bowel accidents. last week i had an accident and my daughter helped me get what i needed to get cleaned up.

i don't know if i ever had the talk with them about my circumstances but they've been around me enough to know what i do and how i do it.

mellowgator

[Talia-Sky]

Like Mellowgators daughters I know pretty much it all, my Dad is my very best friend in the world we tell each other everything. Most people don't agree with how he tells me everything but that's just how he's raised me since day one. We have a very special relationship, there's nothing I won't do for him, I love him more then life its self. He Say's I'm like a time I remind him about his meds all the time even from school I text him, he always forgets especially at work. I've even changed my Dad's Super Public Catheter twice due to it clogging and no one else was around.

[manda6843]

Courtney, on 04 February 2010 - 03:18 AM, said:

Duke and Abbi know almost everything. We've explained the injury in detail. They know about catherization. They know that daddy has to transfer onto a different chair to go "poo", but they don't know any details about that. We've been pretty up front about everything. They understand alot more than you realize....

Courtney - I really like your signature quote.