[Justin14]

I found this site threw a friend so thought i'd give it a chance...I just don't know what to do with my self anyore....all I ever did was surf and hang on the beach...My girlfriend is gone and has been pretty much since the second I was hurt and so are my pre-accident friends...I am finding new friends who are great but I just want to be me again...Does this get any easier???

[KeepTheFaith]

Get back to the beach and get surfing! After all "it's your life"

Check-out Barney Miller's website: http://www.barneymillerclassic.com/

and also look up Patrick Iveson, the Ambassador for "Life Rolls On"

I have met both these individuals at Project Walk, where they are doing exercise based recovery. Both are C5 quads!
By the way, Barney has an amazing girlfriend, who he met after his injury.

[Tetracyclone]

hey justin- Welcome. yeah, it gets better. I'm C5-7, incomplete and 20 months out. At first i couldn't spit over my chin, but now I can spit all over my chin. Biking was my passion and led to my injury. One year out i couldn't pedal a stationary bike, but now I can. Possibly in another year I will get a three wheeled bike that I can use outdoors. I don't expect to be like I was, never happen, but there is the same pleasure from achieving something difficult.

Are you 14? If so, just being young is quite a challenge, but don't worry. Youth is not permanent.

[edlee]

Yeah, bud,, it does,,, but it also gets easier. Problem is, you have to work awfully hard to make it easier.

Like surfing,, you have to learn the board, the balance and the waves,,,, took work to make it look easy,,, so does this.

If you have questions,, ask. There are some pretty smart people, here..... maybe not me,, but there are others who are.
ed

[guido]

Hi Justin - most people on this site have been through the adjustments you're having to make. The more you read around and get to know individuals and hear different opinions and advice, the more you'll realise there are so many ways of handling what you're going through. And you'll also find that you hear different things depending on the age of the person giving it. Lots of people here will offer advice but also you might like to hear more relevant stuff from people your age - and there's a number of them here too.

Try this link to another thread: http://www.apparelyz...showtopic=10724

Friends do change over the years, but then they do if you're not injured too. Stick around here and ask questions. Have a think about what you'd like to do and then find a way to do it. Achieving stuff will give you a self-confidence boost which will make you enjoy being around others.

Surfing threads - have a look through these:

http://www.apparelyzed.com/forums/index.ph...&hl=surfing
http://www.apparelyzed.com/forums/index.ph...&hl=surfing
http://www.apparelyzed.com/forums/index.ph...&hl=surfing

[Justin14]

Tetracyclone, on Feb 15 2010, 12:42 PM, said:

hey justin- Welcome. yeah, it gets better. I'm C5-7, incomplete and 20 months out. At first i couldn't spit over my chin, but now I can spit all over my chin. Biking was my passion and led to my injury. One year out i couldn't pedal a stationary bike, but now I can. Possibly in another year I will get a three wheeled bike that I can use outdoors. I don't expect to be like I was, never happen, but there is the same pleasure from achieving something difficult.

Are you 14? If so, just being young is quite a challenge, but don't worry. Youth is not permanent.

Yes I am 14..I was hurt the day after my Birthday...Some gift

This post has been edited by Justin14: 15 February 2010 - 07:13 PM

[airart1]

gets alot easier, stay in school so u'll have a job, meet people and don't get any sores on your tush, we are all alike and we are just as different on here, but everyone will help..............keep as active as possible, your young, u can take advantage of that while u can............

This post has been edited by airart1: 15 February 2010 - 09:48 PM

[Tetracyclone]

Hey Justin! The day after your birthday? i was hurt on my wedding anniversary. so 2 anniversaries in one!

[jules]

Hi Justin

Things will get easier, I had my accident when I was 15 so not that different from you, also doing the thing I loved and which was my whole life at the time - Gymnastics.

Jules

[Justin14]

Tetracyclone, on Feb 15 2010, 04:52 PM, said:

Hey Justin! The day after your birthday? i was hurt on my wedding anniversary. so 2 anniversaries in one!

Yep the day after...Went to the beach with my older brother and sister in the afternoon like pretty much any Spring or Summer day...caught a couple waves then the next thing I can remember is being under the water....then I just remember waking up in the ICU.

[edlee]

Mine was ON my birthday, five years ago. Being an old goat, I have a lot of memories to look back on when I get down. You, on the other hand, have a lot of them to look forward to. My advice would be to start making some. Hang in there.
ed

[kiwiquad]

Being an ol' goat like ed, but 26yrs post sci, I couldn't agree more. It's great advise .. Good luck.

[airart1]

yep, he stated a fact....mine was on my X wifes birthday, i should have seen the sign!

[spot]

Justin,

I want to be my old self, too. I want to scuba dive, hike, bike, canoe, etc. But I have to look for new things to do. One of those new things just happens to be surfing. There are several surfers who post on this site. Guido gave you the links, so check it out.

Here are a few "old lady" comments. You are 14 and it seems the whole world has ended. Over time, you will find new friends. But keep up what you love best. Surfing will be different, but possible. You can still hang out at the beach! Work at keeping strong and getting back as much function as possible. If you are healed enough to get in the water, do it. Fight with everything you have. When it all seems to be too much, get on this site and rant. We all do it. There will be people with ideas who really understand your situation.

Good luck to you.

[Ratticis]

Short answer, yes it gets easier.
Longer answer, it takes work and tollerence of a lot of stupidity and people (synonymous, I know). Nothing in life ever comes easy, but you gotta play the hand your dealt, even if it means bluffing.
Now get your ass back to the beach! There'll be mixed emotions, no doubt, but go for it. I sat in my truck (49 ford flathead v8 4speed that I built piece by piece with my dad) at a car show last summer for the 1st time in over 2 years and went through a crapload of emotions. Still runs beautifully, but that belt squeal drove me nuts. I could push the clutch, but it took both arms to hold my leg
But, now it's on to the next project, being a 36 chev 2 door coupe. That and I gots ta get back on the racetrack this summer.
Sorry, kinds took a detour through my own mind there, but the point is you're still you, legs or not

[Justin14]

Ratticis, on Feb 20 2010, 03:31 AM, said:

Short answer, yes it gets easier.
Longer answer, it takes work and tollerence of a lot of stupidity and people (synonymous, I know). Nothing in life ever comes easy, but you gotta play the hand your dealt, even if it means bluffing.
Now get your ass back to the beach! There'll be mixed emotions, no doubt, but go for it. I sat in my truck (49 ford flathead v8 4speed that I built piece by piece with my dad) at a car show last summer for the 1st time in over 2 years and went through a crapload of emotions. Still runs beautifully, but that belt squeal drove me nuts. I could push the clutch, but it took both arms to hold my leg
But, now it's on to the next project, being a 36 chev 2 door coupe. That and I gots ta get back on the racetrack this summer.
Sorry, kinds took a detour through my own mind there, but the point is you're still you, legs or not

I think once i start going back to the beach I will feel a little better...my parent got me a chair that goes threw the sand and it just came in...now i'm just waiting for it to be a little warmer.

This post has been edited by Justin14: 20 February 2010 - 01:25 PM

[guido]

Justin14, on Feb 20 2010, 01:24 PM, said:

I think once i start going back to the beach I will feel a little better...my parent got me a chair that goes threw the sand and it just came in...now i'm just waiting for it to be a little warmer.

Nice one! Post some beach and/or surfing pics when you get back out! It motivates others.

[mellowgator]

hi justin,

i just joined the sight and my heart really goes out to you. i too use to surf and didn't realize it was possible until i saw the video someone linked to these comments.

i have a 14 year old daughter who i'd like to introduce you to. she surfs and snow and skate boards. trust me your'e going to have to beat the girls off with a stick.

i think the first year is super hard but once you start gaining independence and confidence you're going to see things different. it's hard enough being 14 without the sci.

good luck

mellowgator

[SuzinNYC]

Hey Justin, I can't imagine what you're going through...but the people here will help you greatly. My BF and I met years after his injury, and we're planning on getting married soon, he's a C6/7 and legally blind, but is back in college and has a busy schedule. We go out, go to jazz and comedy clubs with other couples who are a mix like us - one disabled, one able bodied, and other friends who are able bodied, we have a converted van, he gets around with a driver. I think his blindness frustrates him more than his paralysis most of the time.

Here in the Detroit area we have a really aggressive Rehab called Rehab Institute of Michigan, that is one of the top places that works to restore as much function as you can get...its a really intense program that people live at...maybe you can have your family look for something like that for you.

Good luck, we'll be pulling for you!

Susan & Roger

[E-DOG]

Does this get any easier?
Shit, if this thing got any easier I'd start to feel guilty for not paying for it!

Yer ol' lady's gone. Poof!
Friends, pals, buds. Out the window. Poof! Look at 'em fly!
Dang, it's a regular dad-gummed magic show!

AND, it happened the day after your birthday.
My goodness it just gets better and better doesn't it?

Don't sweat the little shit kid. That's number one.
Number two? It's ALL little shit.

Welcome to our teeny weeny itsy bitsy slice o' heaven there kiddo.

E-dog

[StillFingers]

Hey Justin, Welcome to the show!

Things do get better...with time, patience and focus. Life and it's opportunities have changed so much since my injury three decades ago, your choices for education, employment, entertainment, sports, hobbies, etc., are near limitless now.

I started surfing at 8 yrs old and continued to do so until near a month after my 21st birthday. Much time has passed since my wave riding days and while I don't surf anymore, I'm down at the beach when ever possible enjoying the waves, seagulls, bonfires and yes, the bikinis. Instead of a board, I carry a camera and still shoot the curls/tubes...just a bit differently now. There are lots of options, don't give up, Guido posted some links, take a look at them, talk to the folks on this site that still surf and get back surfing when you can.

Do I miss my youthful life, damn right, how do you replace screaming down a 25 foot wall of pure joy...you don't, but there are some pretty sweet memories; winters at the wedge were the best and scariest. Six second bonzi rides were a blast, going over the falls into that washing machine full of ocean and sand sure did suck...but I'd be out there doing it again if possible. I still remember the rush of a long glassy tube and the pleasure of those solitary transcending moments waiting for that next ride...feelings this aging man will never surrender.

Cherish the time you had surfing, being at one with nature is a privilege, go back out when you feel like you can and enjoy.

Since my injury I've found lots of things to do, plenty of difficult times and much happiness. I have no doubt you will find your way, you are a young man, explore the possibilities, manage/overcome setbacks, find what you love in life and kickass...

My best to you.

Jerry

This post has been edited by StillFingers: 05 March 2010 - 04:21 AM

[sammyc78]

Justin14, on Feb 15 2010, 05:06 PM, said:

I found this site threw a friend so thought i'd give it a chance...I just don't know what to do with my self anyore....all I ever did was surf and hang on the beach...My girlfriend is gone and has been pretty much since the second I was hurt and so are my pre-accident friends...I am finding new friends who are great but I just want to be me again...Does this get any easier???

Hey fella,
You sound down in the dumps? Where are you? What happened to you? When were you injured? I was involved in a motorcycle accident in 1996 and broke my back T5 complete. f*@k all feeling below my nipples which is a shit on times. What level are you? My girlfriend jumped ship after I sustained my injury as well and think that that is very similar to alot of us wheelies. She was obviously not the one for ya? My friend is a C2,3,4 break and has just met someone who he is very happy with, so there is certainly hope out there... I have had more attention from women since being in my chair than I ever did before too, so just chill dude. Some people say its just sympathy, but I believe its cos Im gorgeous and theyre just jealous?! (o; Have you had issues with sores yet?
I agree it can be a very lonely existance on times when you are on your own and after discharge from hospital, had no friends who had stayed in touch as the ones prior injury were off playing football, and I couldnt take part. They werent even interested in associating with 'the wheelchair boy'! Luckily for me there is a wheelchair club who does holidays for the disabled. At first, I didnt want to be associated with other wheelchair users...Bunch of spaks, but I got talked round and attended one of their 'courses'. That was the turning point in my life...Was excellent, cos all the other wheelies were having exactly the same problems as me, and could empathise which was nice in itself...Having someone who truly understood, cos able bodied walkers will never understand...Despite how much they say they do...I bought myself a dog. Alfie. Hes a labrador and great fun. Sometimes he can be a tie, meaning I cant do things at the drop of a hat, but the people I associate with on his walk have dogs of their own, so understand. He is good company and gets me out meeting people and socialising.
I would be keen to talk with you again, if you feeling low drop me a line.
Speak soon,

Sam & Alfie
x

[Justin14]

sammyc78, on Mar 21 2010, 11:09 AM, said:

Justin14, on Feb 15 2010, 05:06 PM, said:

I found this site threw a friend so thought i'd give it a chance...I just don't know what to do with my self anyore....all I ever did was surf and hang on the beach...My girlfriend is gone and has been pretty much since the second I was hurt and so are my pre-accident friends...I am finding new friends who are great but I just want to be me again...Does this get any easier???

Hey fella,
You sound down in the dumps? Where are you? What happened to you? When were you injured? I was involved in a motorcycle accident in 1996 and broke my back T5 complete. f*@k all feeling below my nipples which is a shit on times. What level are you? My girlfriend jumped ship after I sustained my injury as well and think that that is very similar to alot of us wheelies. She was obviously not the one for ya? My friend is a C2,3,4 break and has just met someone who he is very happy with, so there is certainly hope out there... I have had more attention from women since being in my chair than I ever did before too, so just chill dude. Some people say its just sympathy, but I believe its cos Im gorgeous and theyre just jealous?! (o; Have you had issues with sores yet?
I agree it can be a very lonely existance on times when you are on your own and after discharge from hospital, had no friends who had stayed in touch as the ones prior injury were off playing football, and I couldnt take part. They werent even interested in associating with 'the wheelchair boy'! Luckily for me there is a wheelchair club who does holidays for the disabled. At first, I didnt want to be associated with other wheelchair users...Bunch of spaks, but I got talked round and attended one of their 'courses'. That was the turning point in my life...Was excellent, cos all the other wheelies were having exactly the same problems as me, and could empathise which was nice in itself...Having someone who truly understood, cos able bodied walkers will never understand...Despite how much they say they do...I bought myself a dog. Alfie. Hes a labrador and great fun. Sometimes he can be a tie, meaning I cant do things at the drop of a hat, but the people I associate with on his walk have dogs of their own, so understand. He is good company and gets me out meeting people and socialising.
I would be keen to talk with you again, if you feeling low drop me a line.
Speak soon,

Sam & Alfie
x

Yeah i'm kind of down but it's getting somewhat easier...I found a couple really good new friends who have helped me a lot...I still say this sucks but not as much...I live in Montauk,NY...I was hurt doing what I love most surfing...It will be a year April 20th.