[Apparelyzed]

Japanese boffins create hover pensioners

SOME JAPANESE researchers have created a solution to a problem that no one knew ever existed. How do you make a wheelchair that can humiliate pensioners, make a lot of noise and, possibly, sweep and polish hard floor surfaces.

A video has appeared online that shows some sort of hover wheelchair being demonstrated to a handful of Japanese men in macintoshes. Although this sounds like it may come from some niche hentai mag it is actually, or should we say apparently, the future of getting about. If you are a pensioner who lives in a highly buffed environment.

The chair, which looks utterly humiliating, seems to be attached to a plug, which is going to limit how the pensioner in question gets about and how far thay can go. Meanwhile physically controlling the chair is left up to an external force, in this case an enthusiastic young man hell bent on kicking and pushing a poor man in a baseball cap around on a shiny floor.

We doubt whether anyone will give up their more conservative mobility vehicles for this alternative, but the researchers are apparently looking for investors.