4 replies to this topic

[Jenna's Mom]

Hi-I'm Kinley.

My 6 year old daughter Jenna has been a c-6 quadriplegic since the age of 14 months old. I just found this site, never to late to learn. We've been dealing with trying to find out how to give Jenna her independence, she wants it very badly now that she's getting older. We've also been dealing with her being self conscious of her chair, this is something we've never dealt with. Jenna has always been very proud of who she is, since starting the 1st grade we've seen a change in her. Myself and my husband have tried to always raise Jenna to be proud of who she is, she's such a loving, intelligent, sweetheart. I'm open to any and all advice that I can get.
Thank you, Kinley
My little princess Jenna
[attachment=9541:6imtheboss.jpg][attachment=9542:2.jpg][attachment=9543:9chair.jpg]

Edited by Jenna's Mom, 02 October 2010 - 04:51 AM.

[bakerk8]

hey kinley,

jenna is adorable!!!!

[Jenna's Mom]

 bakerk8, on 02 October 2010 - 05:53 AM, said:

hey kinley,

jenna is adorable!!!!

Thank you-she's such a sweetie.

[linda]

First may I start by saying? your daughter is a beautiful little girl!
Now.. You sound uncertain as to how she will gain independence? When my daughter was her age I too wondered the same, I often sat for hours thinking what course of action I will have if she didn't become indigent. My daughter is a C6 incomplete, she's had her injury since birth. I have watched her grow with such determination to be a self relying independent individual. She's now 25 years old and doing quite well, she has close family great friends with a wonderful job. She has grown with the abilities to do what ever the world allows for her.

The important thing is to always support your child, give her the tools that will make it possible for her to grow. She will try many things..not all will be successful! She will get frustrated, angry and even want to give up from time to time...that's where you will be most needed! you will have to encourage her to keep trying that being disappointed and angry is ok, however giving up isn't an option! Its not about what she unable to achieve, understandably that's what many parents see first, its all about what she IS capable of doing!

Just be there... let her fall! its part of learning no different from any other child. Just give her all the tools she will need and support her when she needs it most. Trust me? she will be fine!!...I know from experience. As for her wheel chair all you can do is teach her its just a chair its not part of her. If family and friends show little focus to the wheel chair she will also show little focus, the wheel chair isn't a part of her... its just a tool to aid her! She's still young she will later learn what a wonderful tool her wheel chair is.

Love your girl.. she's beautiful!
If you would like to talk more feel free to either post here... or message me.

Linda,

[Courtney]

Hi! Your daughter is beautiful!! if you happen to know someone else (especially a girl) with the same level of injury as her, it might help for her to talk to someone she can relate to

Unfortunately children can be cruel without intending to do so. The self conciousness may have started because someone has asked her or said something to her about her injury.
Even my 32 year old husband was very self concious after his injury. He didn't like being stared at, which I"m sure is what the kids at school are doing. Just love her, don't sugar coat everything, and teach her to stand up for herself and what to say to inform the kids at school who ask (and believe me, they will ask her directly) about "what is wrong with you." My daughter, who is in kindergarten asks about other people and especially children in chairs by saying "what is wrong with that person" even though she isn't trying to be mean. I explain to her that there is nothing "wrong" with them and tell her exactly the nature of their injury or birth defect....kids are much more intelligent that most people think. Her dad is a C6 quad and she is just very curious. Truth be told, most of the kids at your daughters school are just curios and want to know....once their curiosity is satisfied and they see that the only thing "wrong" with her is that she can't walk and her hands don't work like theirs, they should let up..... Where are you? One thing she might get a kick out of is watching a quad rugby game. There is a girl with a c6 injury on our team. Seeing others with the same injury as her lead normal lives will help her see past the chair she is in. Let me know where you are and I can tell you where the closest game will be and get you in touch with a girl on the team....