9 replies to this topic

[Dana2010]

Dylan has a great group of friends, they've all been close since meeting at 5 years old wile playing t-ball. Over the last few months they've all been very amazing not missing a day of Dylan's recovery, even now at least 1 out of the 5 of them comes to visit everyday. They have been wanting to take Dylan out with them for a little bit one day, my husband and daughter think it's ok but I'm having a very hard time. With Dylan's injury including his sci and brain injury It makes me worry so much, at the same time I know his friends have been around so much that they could most likely handle anything that comes up.

Any advise on letting go a little would be very greatly appreciated.

[Tetracyclone]

Go with them the first few times and keep your mouth shut.

[wheeliebear75]

I was just gonna suggest that! Just be a few feet back or so....that way the feel as though they've got they're "space" & can show you how well they can take care of him but you'll still be there IF you're needed. Since most teenagers have cell phones THAT should take a lot of the worry out of it for you...heck they could even send ya a picture of them all having a great time. If he has friends that still want to be a part of his life this should be 100% encouraged....what could be more "normal" than going for a stroll with your homies?


So long as he isn't on a vent or has seizures than medically speaking he'll be fine & I'd say if they've been around & were "OK with" accidents than THAT rules just about anything else out. If they haven't left him out of the circle than they won't leave him high & dry or do anything like that. Sandbox love/friendship runs DEEP even deeper than the sand.

[Dana2010]

wheeliebear75, on 05 January 2011 - 12:42 PM, said:

I was just gonna suggest that! Just be a few feet back or so....that way the feel as though they've got they're "space" & can show you how well they can take care of him but you'll still be there IF you're needed. Since most teenagers have cell phones THAT should take a lot of the worry out of it for you...heck they could even send ya a picture of them all having a great time. If he has friends that still want to be a part of his life this should be 100% encouraged....what could be more "normal" than going for a stroll with your homies?


So long as he isn't on a vent or has seizures than medically speaking he'll be fine & I'd say if they've been around & were "OK with" accidents than THAT rules just about anything else out. If they haven't left him out of the circle than they won't leave him high & dry or do anything like that. Sandbox love/friendship runs DEEP even deeper than the sand.

Your post made me really see how I need to let go, just be you thinking Dylan is a teenager. Dylan and his friends are all 25 and 26 years old, just have to let go a little.
Thank you

[nomis]

Fantastic opportunity for Dylan to have a taste of real life being with his contemporaries out in the world, no matter how simple that may be. If you want him to have a life you just bite your bottom lip and let him go. His friends have stuck with him a long time so they'll take good care of him and open a whole new world of excitement to him. So great that he has such supportive and courageous friends.

[lbcline04]

His friends will surprise you. Matt told me stories about his friends taking him out after his accident when he was just 17-18. He said one time, since he was still learning how to keeps things in check, he peed himself and of course they all playfully teased him but then they all helped get him new clothes and such. Let him have fun!! If you aren't comfortable for a long period, just ask them to start out with shorter outings then gradually plan longer activities.

[roo]

hi there his friends wont let him come to any harm ,and a taste at the real world would be great for him,,and you also,,,we all need our friends,,,and our mums worrys ,also,,,
best of luck roo

[Dana2010]

Dylan is out with his friends tonight, so far so good.

[LovingSister]

I understand your anxiety over this but I think you should let him go. The first time for anything is always the hardest. He will be fine and they all have cell phones I'm sure to call for help if needed. I am impressed that his friends have stuck around and even want to do this for him, your son is blessed. So let him go and when you finally relax you may even enjoy some free time for yourself ;)

[S&W Winger]

I agree with Sis, Dylan must have wonderful friends! Also a reflection on him and on You his Mom! Sounds like he has plenty of support, of which we all know the importance...hope he enjoyed the evening and that YOU did as well!

Edited by S&W Winger, 13 January 2011 - 02:04 PM.