3 replies to this topic

[martin27]

Hi - I hope this is a suitable forum for my post, but it may not be. I apologise to the moderators if so and if you delete my post I'll know it wasn't suitable.

My situation at the moment is quite simple but not something I ever imagined I'd be facing. I was told six days ago my friend was in hospital because she fainted on some steps. At first it didn't sound too bad - but the details have been trickling out from her relatives and I'm now fearing the worst (we live a long way apart and used to only talk on the phone & email).

This is what's happened to her: she's been in a coma for 6 days since the fall, and at least in the beginning was on IV. The doctors immediately said she's suffering from Neurogenic Shock and that she'd damaged her spine. Hypotension was an immediate problem and today her blood pressure remains very low. They were also worried about organ failure. They have refused to speculate on when/if she will wake up, and they've already raised the possibility of her not being able to walk. They told her family (this is the most upsetting thing I heard) to "prepare for the worst but hope for the best".

That's basically the extent of what I know. Because I'm a long-distance friend I don't feel I can harangue her family for more detail as I know they must be going through hell. It's extremely difficult to cope with feeling so helpless and just not knowing what's going to happen. I have spent hours upon hours researching all the medical terms but the more I read the more confused I get - all I know is it's probably serious. The most optimistic thing I can come up with is that it *might* not be a spine injury, and the shock might have come and gone. Some of the stuff I've read (eg about 'irreversible shock') has had me distraught. I can't ask doctors anything so I don't even know basic info - like if organ damage has occured; if comas should last this long; if the shock passed. I pretty much know nothing and it's probably self-apparent what effect this is having on me.

I don't have any specific questions because I am sure the details I've given aren't enough to make a prognosis, even if you were a trained medical professional. I feel in my gut that the chances of her surviving are low, and surviving without paralysis very low. She has suffered from depression for years and the thought of her being wheelchair bound is excrutiating to me because I've read that one in three people never come to terms with it. I don't know what I'm hoping to achieve by posting this, but perhaps there is a silver lining in some of what I've said.

My apologies if this was inappropriate and I won't take offence if you delete the post.

Thank you

[rue2you]

Let's hope for the best! The human body is an amazing thing and only time will tell about that. However, if the worst thing that happens is that she is paralyzed, life is still so very wonderful if she wants it to be. It really is up to the individual. You never know, this could maybe be the thing that helps her pull her life together to accomplish something great. There is something about being met face to face with how fragile you really are, that can charge you up and make you ready to take on the world - even if it is on wheels!

[mellowgator]

hi martin,

there are so many different stories here and we all are different. yes, people are in comas for a long time and they do recover. the reverse is also true.

try to stay positive as this is all so new and anything is possible at this point. the doctors don't have the answers and don't know what to tell the family. the "prepare for the worst" speech is just them not wanting to give false hope. it doesn't mean much at this point.


mellowgator

[martin27]

I just want to say thank you rue2you & mellowgator for your comforting messages of support. There's no change in her situation so I'm just digging in for the long-haul. Her heart and lungs are working so it's just the coma & spine & hypotension ("just"?!). I am desperate not to lose her. I'm no longer thinking about any physical damage, I'm just thinking of the person inside who may not be there any more.....

It's sometimes hard to stop yourself giving in to negative thoughts, but when I read some of the posts on here I just feel humbled and as though I have a duty to be stronger than I have been. I never would have come across this forum under normal circumstances, but it's an inspiration. Every time I've ever felt depressed before now seems like a pathetic childish joke. I'm 6'4 and I feel about an inch tall.

I'm praying an absurd amount (hypocritically so, given that I'm not even religious) and I will think of the people on this forum in my next prayer. Thank you for thinking of a stranger.