It has been 10 days since our lives will change forever or atleast this moment in life. You think this kind of accident will never happen to you or to any of your loved ones. It is so hard I can't even imagine what he is going through. I miss him so much and still cry everyday.Everyone tells me things in our lives happen for a reason. I want to scream everytime I hear someone say that. What was the reason for this?! The hardest part right now is still not being able to see him for me to tell him it's gonna be ok and I'm here for you NO MATTER WHAT ! I don't know what to do with myself. I seek answers in everyone and when they don't know the answer I feel myself getting angry. I have to remember to breathe and stay calm. I blame everyone there that day for not stopping him getting tackled and hate myself for not being there when it happened. I know it is nobody's fault and only an accident, but I can't help my feelings. I talk with friends who knew about us and they say pray for him and leave him be. How can anyone say that! This doesn't make him any less a man then he was before his accident. So I found this website to talk with people who understand what he and I are going through. I can't just walk away. We made a promise to each other and I just hope he still holds onto his promise, too.
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Started by
km143
, May 18 2011 03:00 AM
5 replies to this topic
Top#2
Chel
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Posted 18 May 2011 - 07:21 AM
KM143,
I do not know the whole story, but as your title say, one must take it one step at a time; one day at a time. Anger is one of the first emotions one experience when trauma arises in his or her life. Do hold on and know that just like you feel different emotions right now; it is possible he will be experiencing different ones as well, but it does not mean he has let go of his promise. Regardless, calm down, learn what you can and take it step by step. I am so sorry you are experiencing this life change, but through it all just know it does get better - each of us here is proof of that. Take good care of youself, so you can be there for him, educate yourself and take it one step at a time. I hope something I have said has helped in some way, but sometimes there are no easy answers, but my best advice to you is to just hold on.
I do not know the whole story, but as your title say, one must take it one step at a time; one day at a time. Anger is one of the first emotions one experience when trauma arises in his or her life. Do hold on and know that just like you feel different emotions right now; it is possible he will be experiencing different ones as well, but it does not mean he has let go of his promise. Regardless, calm down, learn what you can and take it step by step. I am so sorry you are experiencing this life change, but through it all just know it does get better - each of us here is proof of that. Take good care of youself, so you can be there for him, educate yourself and take it one step at a time. I hope something I have said has helped in some way, but sometimes there are no easy answers, but my best advice to you is to just hold on.
"A Friend Loveth at all times even though he or she may disagree."
#3
km143
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Posted 19 May 2011 - 12:58 AM
Chel, on 18 May 2011 - 07:21 AM, said:
KM143,
I do not know the whole story, but as your title say, one must take it one step at a time; one day at a time. Anger is one of the first emotions one experience when trauma arises in his or her life. Do hold on and know that just like you feel different emotions right now; it is possible he will be experiencing different ones as well, but it does not mean he has let go of his promise. Regardless, calm down, learn what you can and take it step by step. I am so sorry you are experiencing this life change, but through it all just know it does get better - each of us here is proof of that. Take good care of youself, so you can be there for him, educate yourself and take it one step at a time. I hope something I have said has helped in some way, but sometimes there are no easy answers, but my best advice to you is to just hold on.
I do not know the whole story, but as your title say, one must take it one step at a time; one day at a time. Anger is one of the first emotions one experience when trauma arises in his or her life. Do hold on and know that just like you feel different emotions right now; it is possible he will be experiencing different ones as well, but it does not mean he has let go of his promise. Regardless, calm down, learn what you can and take it step by step. I am so sorry you are experiencing this life change, but through it all just know it does get better - each of us here is proof of that. Take good care of youself, so you can be there for him, educate yourself and take it one step at a time. I hope something I have said has helped in some way, but sometimes there are no easy answers, but my best advice to you is to just hold on.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words. It's so hard not being able to be there for him. Not because I don't want to, but because I'm not allowed in the ICU only family. I try and stay calm and think of all the memories we have and hopefully more to come, but I find myself crying and wanting to do nothing. I have to make myself even get up to go to work.I just have to stop and breathe and try and stay calm for him and myself. A long, long rocky road ahead of us.
#4
Chel
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Posted 19 May 2011 - 05:36 AM
You are so welcome; I wish I could have said something better to help, but just remember anytime you want to talk ask questions are just need someone to listen feel free because this has been a [lace of friends, fun and sharing for me. Hang in there and remember to take care of you too! 
"A Friend Loveth at all times even though he or she may disagree."
#5
bucsaringer
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Posted 19 May 2011 - 05:57 PM
km143,
I grew very tired of that expression, Everything Happens For a Reason In Life, also. It's been almost seven years since my accident, I've accepted it for what it is and I certainly haven't found a reason for it. You are in for a very rocky road as is he. You have to stay strong and positive for him, As Chel said, you need to take care of yourself, too. I'm sure he's very concerned about you and your relationship with him. Once, he's out of ICU and you can talk things out, I hope you can work things out. It won't be easy, but I wish you all the best and I'm certainly sending my positive thoughts your way.
I grew very tired of that expression, Everything Happens For a Reason In Life, also. It's been almost seven years since my accident, I've accepted it for what it is and I certainly haven't found a reason for it. You are in for a very rocky road as is he. You have to stay strong and positive for him, As Chel said, you need to take care of yourself, too. I'm sure he's very concerned about you and your relationship with him. Once, he's out of ICU and you can talk things out, I hope you can work things out. It won't be easy, but I wish you all the best and I'm certainly sending my positive thoughts your way.
Edited by bucsaringer, 19 May 2011 - 10:08 PM.
It is good to have an end to journey towards,
but it is the journey that matters in the end.
but it is the journey that matters in the end.
#6
km143
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Posted 20 May 2011 - 01:56 AM
bucsaringer, on 19 May 2011 - 05:57 PM, said:
km143,
I grew very tired of that expression, Everything Happens For a Reason In Life, also. It's been almost seven years since my accident, I've accepted it for what it is and I certainly haven't found a reason for it. You are in for a very rocky road as is he. You have to stay strong and positive for him, As Chel said, you need to take care of yourself, too. I'm sure he's very concerned about you and your relationship with him. Once, he's out of ICU and you can talk things out, I hope you can work things out. It won't be easy, but I wish you all the best and I'm certainly sending my positive thoughts your way.
I grew very tired of that expression, Everything Happens For a Reason In Life, also. It's been almost seven years since my accident, I've accepted it for what it is and I certainly haven't found a reason for it. You are in for a very rocky road as is he. You have to stay strong and positive for him, As Chel said, you need to take care of yourself, too. I'm sure he's very concerned about you and your relationship with him. Once, he's out of ICU and you can talk things out, I hope you can work things out. It won't be easy, but I wish you all the best and I'm certainly sending my positive thoughts your way.
Thank you so much for encouraging and honest words. Yeah, I don't get the reason why a lot of things happens. I am tired of it they say either pretty much cut your ties and run or this is Gods way of bringing you two closer. What?! We were close we were happy. I want to scream at them. He is being moved to a rehab today and what hurts the most is he wasn't divorced yet the papers never signed so she has every say over him. She is moving him to a rehab, but now will not tell anyone where he will be going she doesn't want any visitors coming to see him. I'm so upset I want to scream!! I am afraid to even say anything or she will never let him see his children she did it before and it will be even harder for him to see his children under his circumstances so now I'm at this huge rock I have to climb over and I don't know what to do. It just gets worse. She refuses to tell anyone his condition. First it was it was an incomplete now it is a complete and finally she said she doesn't know that the Drs. say it will take years for them to find out if he has a complete/incomplete. What to do!! I find out information through his friends she still talks to, but they are not even allowed to see him either. Which, I find outragous because you would think he'd want to have the support from everyone and yes especially me. Really sad tonight
I just want to see him.~KMChel, on 19 May 2011 - 05:36 AM, said:
You are so welcome; I wish I could have said something better to help, but just remember anytime you want to talk ask questions are just need someone to listen feel free because this has been a [lace of friends, fun and sharing for me. Hang in there and remember to take care of you too!
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