25 replies to this topic

[justbeingme]

hey, since being discharged and living at home alone etc im starting to get bored and i dont know what to do or where to go, i would like to do something get out there and meet new people but just dont know where to start, what do you do to pass the time besides the normal rituals of everyday sci life?

[Bethann]

 justbeingme, on 15 January 2012 - 12:25 PM, said:

hey, since being discharged and living at home alone etc im starting to get bored and i dont know what to do or where to go, i would like to do something get out there and meet new people but just dont know where to start, what do you do to pass the time besides the normal rituals of everyday sci life?

I walk my dog everyday, go to the library, shopping, out to eat, used to go watch my nieces sporting events but they are gone away in college now. Just to name a few.

[Califanna]

Volunteering your time is another option for you. When you volunteer you get an opportunity to meet new people and also to educate them about the disabled population. I don't know what opportunities are there where you live, you just have to look for them.

When my children were little, I volunteered at their school in the library. I got to teach the children and the educators that the disabled population is nothing to be scared of and that you can talk to us. I enjoyed that time and I know the school appreciated my help.

Edited by Califanna, 15 January 2012 - 02:34 PM.

[StillFingers]

Get a camera, discover the world, people and places around you...enjoy being outside, see with new eyes, create images that speak from your heart! I also read, write, write poetry, garden, cook, lift weights and mentor/volunteer when possible...

Edited by StillFingers, 15 January 2012 - 06:18 PM.

[rollingtrouble]

If I get bored, I scheme and plot different ways to cause trouble for all around me. I have issues and I don't mind sharing or causing a scene, I'm kinda crazy like that and although I don't know why, I just don't care because its fun and I can get away with it.

[rue2you]

I have 6 children age 12 and under, I homeschool, my husband and I are in the ministry so we deal with people every single day, I am extremely independent, and I love to shop. I don't think I know the meaning of the word bored!

[Tinbasher]

I have two jobs, several hobbies and a house to keep in repair.

Volunteering is a great idea, in my case it led to a new job, masters degree and a 20 year second career.

[justbeingme]

thanks for the replies, how long after your accident did you start this stuff? just im worried about toilet problems ( both ) while out or doing stuff and routines etc

[Tinbasher]

I guess I took about 3 years to get my head around it all. Worrying about what "might" happen can stop you finding out what "will" happen.

If you are having toilet trouble at home then you will when out but if not you should be fine, just be prepared with a change of pants etc if its a real probability.

Taking the first steps are the hardest. Good luck.

[justbeingme]

im not having problems at home unless im not well that can throw things, but you mentioned taking a spare pair of trousers but i can only get ready on the bed :S how do you manage to take off dirty pants in your chair clean then put new ones on!?

[greybeard]

 justbeingme, on 16 January 2012 - 03:46 PM, said:

im not having problems at home unless im not well that can throw things, but you mentioned taking a spare pair of trousers but i can only get ready on the bed :S how do you manage to take off dirty pants in your chair clean then put new ones on!?

Practice?

[JaneC]

If you are under the care of a spinal injuries centre they should be able to help with toileting issues, and hopefully reassure you about any worries. It does take a while before you develop the confidence to cope with this sort of issue and not get so embarrassed.

As to what to do....what did you do before ?

I had my accident horse riding and was very keen to get back ridding, so I joined the Riding for the Disabled and am now back riding, fund raise for them and am on two committees !!

I also enjoy photography, socialising with friends, yoga and keeping up with my grandchildren.

If you can don't think "I can't do that" just "how can I now do that" .

[Tinbasher]

As GB says practice but will you ever need to?

It sounds a bit like your sitting at home worrying about all the things that might go wrong. Do you get out on your own yet? You can set yourself little goals depending on what interests you.

[justbeingme]

i can get out by myself but got nowhere to go as im alone through the day everyday almost, i never really had hobby really the only thing i done would be work and ride my bike on the weekends other than that on the computer, i wish i had something i could get into with other like myself too, i would visit my spinal unit but its about 50min drive to get there not to mention the petrol costs, if i had a purpose to go out through the day i would make the effort and look forward to doing it, but yes i do sit here and think too much of what will go wrong etc

[mcjane]

I cath before I leave the house but still wear a Depends AND a Poise pad. The big pads hold an incredible amount and I think even a guy could use one inside some tighty whiteys or an adult diaper.

You really need to get outdoors and change your routine. It helps your mind. I spend a lot of time at home reading, on the computer, playing Scrabble, chatting on the phone, but human interaction is important. It took me almost a year before I was ready to venture out socially. It's always a trip ! Double entendre there...

[D. Smith]

Like others have said, can't worry about what might go wrong. I've pee'd myself in public before. If I was out, I'd just do the best I could till I could get home. Don't draw attention to it and hope that the place you are at has dim lighting. As far as bowel, keep a set of spare clothes. There is no easy way to clean up and what not but gotta do the best you can. As far as hobbies, what about music, reading, art, etc? I play guitar.. Well, strum mindlessly sometimes.

[Stand]

Do you have a college degree? You could always go back and take online courses if there's not one nearby to attend physically. I have no use of my hands but lately I've been thinking about painting, obviously with my mouth. I think it would be cool and a good way to express myself. Unless you live in the middle of nowhere, you can always go online to find groups of people who meet up to do certain things with a specific interest. For example, a book club if you enjoy reading. Just a few suggestions.

I hope you find what you're looking for!

[justbeingme]

i think i might go to college im gona enquire about it soon, i dun owhat ill do yet but ill take a look it will get me out for a little bit get to see and meet new people so think it might be good

[rattrap]

I recommend college. I've yet to find a way for me to have a decent social life, but college has allowed me to meet plenty of ppl and make friends.

[LeeS]

I'm lucky enough to be helping run my familys business therefor if I ever need time off etc they work around me, I did work in a garage before and when there I told them my position and they were happy to work around me aswell!

As for social life its not all doom and gloom, I have a brilliant social life, I'm out every night with friends out and at weekends in the pubs/clubs.

My current friends I've known before my wheels and theyve been very helpful and supportive and helped me through things and we've just carried on with life as well as possible and every time we go places a wee bit of planning is involved just to make sure I can access places, Anything is possible, to start with I didnt think that it is but over time ive discovered it is!

[Kwag_Myers]

In between Rehab and returning to work I did a lot of jigsaw puzzles and video games. Not very productive, but it took a while before I really felt up to leaving the house (both physically and emotionally). I'm a researcher by nature (and occupation), so I also spent a great deal of my time here and other web sites learning as much as possible about my injury. Now I'm back to work full time.

Socially, my church keeps me pretty busy. Some of my retired friends are always taking me to a movie or out to lunch. Occasionally, I'll have some of the kids over for a video game party.

That's pretty much it. Hope this helps.

[bythegraceofGod]

I am on the Internet a big chunk of the day. I watch a little TV, sometimes get on the PS3. My wife and I will play cards, or cut coupons. I recently started out patient therapy at our local hospital, so I go there twice a week. When we are out we try to stop at a store or two, just because.
I too worry about accidents while I am out.

[Ang]

I volunteer at the hospital two days a week although I haven't been able to go for the past 3 months because I need my chair fixed and my shower situation taken care of but hopefully that will be done in two weeks. I went back to college when I was in my 30's it was the best thing I did for myself. Made friends and got to hang out with different people. Even worked for ten years, started student working in the admissions office, and stayed in that field after I graduated. And yes I worry about the bathroom issues as well. Gotta love depends hahahaha. My advice to you is to find something to do.... don't wait the longer you wait the harder it is to get out there. It does wonders for your self esteem to get out and do something. I also love the internet met some kewl people on here.

[Chococat]

I only started ic last summer & it took 2 months before i even ventured out the house & back to work. It was difficult at first as i was worried about accidents & yes they did happen a few times....i wd be mortified & go home. Initially i felt as if my whole day revolved around when the next trip to the loo wd be, i was constantly clockwatching! Well im glad to say my confidence has increased since then. Accidents can still happen but i don't panic as much. Im more prepared. Think you just have to persevere to get used to doing things outwith the comfort of home.

You'll feel much better once u have taken the first step. Social interaction is v important. I didn't realise how much i missed my colleagues & it felt good to get the brain ticking again! All the best

[Zack]

In the summer, being in upstate New York, I used to spend lots of days at a few different parks. Favorite one was right on the Hudson river. There I had plenty of privacy too watch my partner tan while I just seemed to turn red even with her constantly spraying with a water bottle to keep me from over heating!
Then there was the Mall she'd drag me to often, where I spent my time telling her everything she tried on looked Good on her!
Evenings were the movies before or after going out to dinner or back to a park on a clear warm night. Pointing out constellations and picking our personal Star.
Winters I Hybernate too much !

Geez, I Miss those days. Amen to Memories.

[russ1]

 justbeingme, on 15 January 2012 - 12:25 PM, said:

hey, since being discharged and living at home alone etc im starting to get bored and i dont know what to do or where to go, i would like to do something get out there and meet new people but just dont know where to start, what do you do to pass the time besides the normal rituals of everyday sci life?

Get on a course with the Backup trust and try some days with sportability (google them) ... I have to say the title of this thread amused me - time. what time I thought, between working, learning to fly, spending time with my kids and my girlfriend I need more time...but it does take a while to get to this stage.

I did my first 2 week ski trip with the backup trust to the USA 5 months after leaving the spinal unit and 11 months after injury and it was a real eye opener and showed me just what was possible.. I can't recommend it enough

Russ