[gazrobsuk]

Proof That The World Is Nuts


In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.


(Like THAT makes sense.)



In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.


(Do they look different reversed?)


Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)


The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")


There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)


In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)


Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)


In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)


In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.





(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)


In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."

(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam!)


Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)


Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)


The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of???)
(Did the government pay for this research??)


Butterflies taste with their feet.


An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)


Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)


And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

[kati_jean]

gazrobsuk, on Sep 14 2006, 05:46 AM, said:

Proof That The World Is Nuts


In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.


(Like THAT makes sense.)



In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.


(Do they look different reversed?)


Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)


The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")


There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)


In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)


Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)


In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)


In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.





(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)


In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."

(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam!)


Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)


Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)


The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of???)
(Did the government pay for this research??)


Butterflies taste with their feet.


An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)


Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)


And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

Those are all REle Funny! [font=Comic Sans Ms]

[juls]

Had a good laugh at these...they're really funny and BIZZARE!!!

[LadyPilot]

Here are some more.....

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced
enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is
produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb
(Now that's more like it!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)


A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)


The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off !
("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")


The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a foot! ball field.
(30 minutes... lucky pig... can you imagine??)


The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)



Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)


The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm........)


Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)


Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(OK, so that would be a good thing....)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.! (I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)



Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig??)

[bigsmiles]

now thats funny, and now i know im related to the pig!!!!!

[cdngrl]

I couldn't scream for 30 minutes

[bigsmiles]

Scream hell NO! its more of a funny twitching thing i do and i can't stop blinking....then the worse thing ,the oinking

[hisamsmith]

I'm currently reading a book titled "you can get arrested for that"

Apparently it's againist the law to do the following;

Playing cards with an American Indian in Globe, AZ

Eating watermelon in a cemetery in Spartanburg, SC

Letting a monkey smoke cigarettes in South Bend, IN

Kissing for longer than 5 minutes straight in Iowa

Fishing while wearing pjs in Chicago, IL

Going to a movie theater within 3 hours of eating garlic in Indianapolis, IN (My hometown)

Giving cigarettes or whiskey to zoo animals in New Jersey

Falling asleep in a cheese factory in South Dakota

Peeling an orange in a hotel room in Californa (shoot I've broken this law)

Hunting whales in Utah (was this a problem? do they even have whales?)

Riding a bike in a swimming pool in Baldwin Park, CA

[Tinkerbell]

very funny....i've had a right little giggle

about hisamsmith's findings....i TRULY believe the world has gone mad

[sandyrun]

Woooooooooo, Pig! Sooie!
Woooooooooo, Pig! Sooie!
Woooooooooo, Pig! Sooie!
Woooooooooo, Pig! Sooie!
Razorbacks!!

(Sorry folks, from Arkansas (USA) and Razorbacks is a college football team.)
30 minutes.....I can dream, can't I!!!???!!! And, the strongest muscle in the body...WOW!!!!!