[cvelusc]

How's everyone feel about viewing photos of themself or a loved one prior SCI? I get choked up and have a very difficult time looking at the photos. Suppose what makes viewing the photos so difficult was that I never stood still -- always running, climbing, playing soccer. Soccer was mine. I consistently was the best on the soccer field. I played at a collegiate level and am chagrin to have lost what I consider my magical feet.

In advance, I apologize if I upset anyone as I may appear to be just whining over spilled milk.

[Joed]

I do get a little nostalgic, for lack of a better word. My injury was really not sudden, so I have to go way back to see photos of me walking without aides or running.

I don't think it's 'whining over spilled milk'....I think it's just a part of the grieving process, and it's okay to take it in in 'doses'. I'd even go so far as to say it's healthy, as long as you're not overwhelmed or consumed by it. But it can be saddening, and I believe a valid emotion to have.

[hisamsmith]

Most of my pre-injury pictures are me as a baby and toddler since I was injured at the age of 6. The only one that upsets me is a picture taken of my brother and me two weeks before my accident. We're running across a field barefoot in our "Sunday best". The pictures of me right after my accident bother me the worst though. Sometimes to the point of crying. I look so helpless and broken in them. I think it's worse since I was such a little kid and really don't remember how bad it was then until I see the pictures again and than it all comes back to me.

[bigsmiles]

Im sending a big cuddle to all of you as reading this has brought a tear to my eye. from me

[Texaswheelz]

Hmm, I both hate and love looking at past photo's. I am the son of a football coach who grew up living sports. I had my wreck at the age of 16, wich will actually be 16 years ago this week, so half of my life has now been as a para. At the time though 90% of pictures i were in was either on the football or baseball field, basketball court, on the track, skiing down a mountian.... Other then school pictures i can't think of one picture within a year of my injury that wasn't sports related.

So to look back on me running, jumping...etc is great, but also not so great at the same time. The biggest joy I get though is when others that only know me post injury look at them.

[mrsE]

I love looking at old photos (ahhh I was so young!) - my one wish would be that I wish I had more taken of me while I was in my prime. I have very few photos; about one every five years or so. I wish I had some of me as a hippy/rock-chick/biker and even some of past boyfriends. It always brings a smile to my face when I look at past photos of myself (even though I am not very photogenic) because they are always of good times. My husband. on the other hand, will not look at any photos of me pre-accident. He never knew me before then and he says he feels too sad to think about it.

[livewriter]

I have 4 pictures and my wife enjoys them more than i do..

[gsp23]

I am pretty new to this as I just started using a wheelchair in July. It doesnt bother me looking at photos, I guess as my boyfriend says... I can easily roll with the punches (not pun intended). It also may help that in my instance I am an incomplete T5/6 and am able to walk very short distances with the use of crutches.

[LadyPilot]

OK, here goes both of the pictures were a taken about a year prior to my horse riding accident. I loved my job as a nurse and I enjoyed horse riding too. Note the horse Im riding was NOT responsible for my accident.
It's never bothered me looking at pictures pre sci. They're still me but Ive lost the weight!!

[milosh]

ladypilot... you're cute. ;)

well, as i'm a quadri the most of my life, i don't have plenty of pre-SCI photos. look at them in sympathetic way... was a sweet child. ;)

[juls]

I really enjoy looking at pre sci photos but normally by the time i've finished looking at them i have a heavy heart. I like showing people though! I think that somedays are harder then others (with anything) if you're feeling a bit depressed, then you probably shouldn't go through all your old photos

I was thinking about starting up a post where we all put a couple of photos of ourselves up pre sci (like Lady pilot did ) What do you guys think???

[LadyPilot]

Thanks milosh that's very kind.

juls, on Oct 11 2006, 04:22 AM, said:

I was thinking about starting up a post where we all put a couple of photos of ourselves up pre sci (like Lady pilot did ) What do you guys think???

I thought that's what this Topic was. I wondered why no-one else had posted pictures

[John Anderson]

It's hard for me, really hard...

Every photos were me playing some sort of sports, whether it's throwing the winning TD, scoring a goal in lacrosse, saving a shot in hockey or grabbing air over fresh powder. Everytime I look at them I just want to go back doing what I use to do before the accident, I want to go back to being able to do anything I want to do and doing nothing that I don't want to do.

It's hard, maybe I will learn to look at them again, someday...

[juls]

John Anderson, on Oct 11 2006, 03:03 PM, said:

It's hard for me, really hard...

Every photos were me playing some sort of sports, whether it's throwing the winning TD, scoring a goal in lacrosse, saving a shot in hockey or grabbing air over fresh powder. Everytime I look at them I just want to go back doing what I use to do before the accident, I want to go back to being able to do anything I want to do and doing nothing that I don't want to do.

It's hard, maybe I will learn to look at them again, someday...

It took me ages John, to look at mine without being reduced to tears...my pics are all active outdoor ones (especially beach, fishing, runnng) it's only really now that i can look at them and feel ok..and it's been 6/7 yrs since my accident.
You might always struggle with looking at them but it will get a little easier with time

[LadyPilot]

juls, on Oct 11 2006, 04:22 AM, said:

I was thinking about starting up a post where we all put a couple of photos of ourselves up pre sci (like Lady pilot did ) What do you guys think???

Yes, why not. Good idea Juls, there must be a few others who would put up their pics.

[John Anderson]

juls, on Oct 11 2006, 01:49 AM, said:

It took me ages John, to look at mine without being reduced to tears...my pics are all active outdoor ones (especially beach, fishing, runnng) it's only really now that i can look at them and feel ok..and it's been 6/7 yrs since my accident.
You might always struggle with looking at them but it will get a little easier with time

Yea...that's what Colonel said..."Just give it time."

I'm usually patient about things, but these kind of things, yea...I can't do.

[xMaddiex]

weirdly enough, jason's fine with looking at his pictures. he thinks that his injury happened for a reason, and the past is the past etc etc, so why be bothered with the fact that you used to walk, and now you can't. It was hard for him at first, but now he's fine with it, because supposedly, time heals all wounds or something, so he says...

[hisamsmith]

My brother and I about 2 months before my injury

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[hisamsmith]

One more close up about a year pre injury

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This post has been edited by hisamsmith: 11 October 2006 - 04:14 PM

[bigsmiles]

Thanks for sharing those....so sweet

[rkzenrage]

It's weird. I did not have just one accident, though I have had a few herniations due to the stenosis and osteoperosis... that is not really the hard part though. The ones that are hard are the ones that are of me when doing the things I loved, though still in pain. I knew about the arthritis since 13. But, I had no idea what I was doing to my bones by climbing mountains, white water tubing (never a good idea) and all the nutty jobs I had.... not that I would NOT have had them, or done them... but I was so callous with my body.
I thought I knew what pain was with the arthritis, lol, I had no idea how little time I had and how sick I really was...
But, I like looking at them. It is like watching a young person who is care-free. It is a beautiful thing.
Something to be celebrated. That person is not me any longer. I have learned from him and enjoy the lessons learned, but even if not sick I would not have been able to go back... so why fret about great things that I was able to experience?


I'm the idiot in the hat...


But, I think I look good now.

[John Anderson]

xMaddiex, on Oct 11 2006, 07:51 AM, said:

weirdly enough, jason's fine with looking at his pictures. he thinks that his injury happened for a reason, and the past is the past etc etc, so why be bothered with the fact that you used to walk, and now you can't. It was hard for him at first, but now he's fine with it, because supposedly, time heals all wounds or something, so he says...

Yea well guess I'm not as strong as he is. I do believe that everything happen for a reason and I thank the Lord everyday that I am here today. It's just hard for me to get through to the fact that I'm not the same person I was before, but then again, I guess only time can heal this kind of hurt...

[Texaswheelz]

This was about a 13 months before before my wreck, sure the hell didn't get to ride any more of those. And for some reason on that bull I looked even skinnier then I actually was.

[John Anderson]

That's cool...I've always wanted to do that, but yea. IS THAT A CLOWN IN THE BACK?!? AHHHHHHHH...

I dislike clowns...

Here's me playing baseball...



Just cuz you guys asked or else I wasn't going to bring it out.

[babs]

oh, the irony of my day...my oldest daughter is in Iraq and just requested I send her some photos from home. I had all the albums out, looking thru for the best ones to send. With each page I was reminiscing the events and after about 30 minutes I found myself bawling & cursing my injuries.

I decided to come on the forum, read up to kind of boost myself back up (as I have found this to help me many times recently) and here I see this topic...(hence the irony) LOL

I am 8 years post injury and have looked at the photos on occasion thru the years with mild pangs of sadness but never as I have had today. (Perhaps it has partly to do with my daughter)

Anyway...I was usually the one taking the pictures so I don't have many of myself pre-sci unless I go wayyy back to before kids were born. If I come across any whilst looking for my daughter, I'll scan & post.

Yes, I am going to keep looking thru and reliving the happy memories, just keeping the tissues close by this time.

Nice pics, everyone.

[juls]

John Anderson, on Oct 12 2006, 08:25 AM, said:

That's cool...I've always wanted to do that, but yea. IS THAT A CLOWN IN THE BACK?!? AHHHHHHHH...

I dislike clowns...

Here's me playing baseball...



Just cuz you guys asked or else I wasn't going to bring it out.

ohhhhhh...your such a cutie john

I hate clowns too..i've watched way to many horror movies with scary clowns!!

[John Anderson]

babs, on Oct 11 2006, 05:45 PM, said:

oh, the irony of my day...my oldest daughter is in Iraq and just requested I send her some photos from home.

Next time you talk to her, please tell her I said thank you for serving, and that she is always family

[John Anderson]

juls, on Oct 11 2006, 07:17 PM, said:

ohhhhhh...your such a cutie john

I hate clowns too..i've watched way to many horror movies with scary clowns!!

Er...thanks

and yes...everyone in my family hates clowns...or I mean dislike them, hate is such a strong word...

[juls]

John Anderson, on Oct 12 2006, 12:02 PM, said:

juls, on Oct 11 2006, 07:17 PM, said:

ohhhhhh...your such a cutie john

I hate clowns too..i've watched way to many horror movies with scary clowns!!

Er...thanks

and yes...everyone in my family hates clowns...or I mean dislike them, hate is such a strong word...

Hate is a strong word that gets used to loosely..i don't like clowns....i hate brussel sprouts!