5 replies to this topic

[dreams]

Too many problems

Edited by dreams, 30 December 2006 - 07:34 PM.

[spinesong]

wow, that's alot of years without a support system or someone you can relate to. i'm sure you will find that and more here. just keep posting and help will come as you express your questions and frustrations.

[Lucydog]

Hi, Welcome to the forum. You will find lots of people here willing to discuss anything nd try to help you out.

I was wondering if I could ask a few further questions to clarify your situation? What sort of care does your partner need and do you give her? Does she have any other complicating injuries? What sort of catheter does she use, how bd are UTIs, and how are you trying to manage them? I wonder if you could give an idea of your location as well?

Hope thats ok, Im sure many people will answer your queries,
thanks
Lucy

[juls]

Hi Janice, welcome to the forum

The forum is a great support group..so you've come to the right place
There is quite a bit of info on here about uti's already, which would be helpful for you or your partner to read. I know just having one or two a year gets me down so it must be very hard for the both of you.

Ask away, everyone here will try to help you out as much as possible and you can vent all you like

Edited by juls, 11 December 2006 - 05:40 AM.

[DaveP]

Hi Janice

Why do you feel you're "caught in a trap"? Explain...

As a T4 paraplegic Jaq shouldn't need you as a "carer" as she should be totally independent. If you've got in the bad habit of doing too much for her that she should've done for herself, then you need to address this with her and start breaking the old bad habits and create new ones.

As you guys have travelled so much and done so much together, is this not happening any more? No reason why not...

[Tinbasher]

dreams, on Dec 10 2006, 08:46 PM, said:

I'm in shock...A whole blank page! Where do I start?

After 8 years of ups & downs with the love of my life Jaq who is a T4 paraplegic. It's wonderful to have found you. Could it be possible to communicate with other people in my situation........Can I really pour out my feelings? It seems too good to be true.

Jacqueline was an International Red Cross Delegate (we are Swiss/Scottish) she speaks 11 languages.Eight years ago,during a "mission" in Colombia,South America,she was the victim of an "incident".At 32 years,(she is now 40)she suddenly became paraplegic at T4. She had many injuries but her strength of character has enabled her to overcome them.

The problem is that as her long term partner - we have been together for 21 years now - I had to take on the role of carer. Over the years this has created a sort of love/hate relationaship. We love each other (no sex of course but the love is still there) but we are finding it increasingly difficult to get over the daily problems..urinary infections are the bane of our lives.
I would love to speak to other women in my position with experience of this situation.. I feel so alone.
J & I have no other family so we have no support group.

I do hope someone will be able to help us,

Thank you,

Janice

I am having some trouble working this out and I realise that it may be you are not comfortable with being fully open with us yet.

Why "no sex of course"?

This situation is 11 years post injury what has changed or was it always so bad? At T4 with no other complication the amount of care needed shouldnt be overwhelming.

Of course the amont of care needed and the amount of care given can differ hugely.

T