Help
It was fine to begin with, other then just about every stall having their products up on a bar type set up that was above my head or above where anyone in a chair could functionally get to it. So yea, I wanna taste their BBQ brisket, but I can’t reach it. BOOO! Then after a hour and a half or so of tasting this and that and my wife getting tons of brochures and such for her future business (she graduates in December and wants to open her own place next year), I had to go to the restroom. So just before I get to the door some guy jumps in front of me, he was nice enough to stop and hold the door and of course stand there in the middle of the door holding it where I can’t get through, so he backs up so I’d just run across his toes and break em if I came through. Finally I got him to understand that I can hold it open long enough for me to get in the rest of the way if he would just move out of the way. So what does he do when he goes in? He makes a bee line for the last stall and of course the only one that is handicap accessible. There are like 10 stalls in the place and about 15 urinals and for some reason people always uses the only one I can get into first. Hell he didn’t think I could open the door by myself but I could some how squeeze through the tiny doors that would be a tight fit if I cut my chair in half. Luckily the last person hadn’t flushed so he came out and went to a second stall. Left me thinking oh great, a nice stunk up unflushed toilet, but no the person before us had only used it to take a wiz. Again 10 stalls, 15 urinals and they use the only big stall to take a piss (happens all the time btw). While I’m on the subject, wtf is with places always putting the handicap stall at the very end? If he would have went in that stall and stayed there, then I would have been sitting there at the end of this long row of pissers just waiting on a guy to come out. The choice is to either sit like a moron and stare at the wall or turn around where it looks like I’m trying to see the package of every man and god forbid little boy that comes in to take a pee. Every place I go to it’s the same. The last stall is the only one I can use, it’s occupied 90% of the time while all the others are empty and not once has the person already in there actually needed to be in that one over the others. I guess they want more room to spread their stench. Then of course while waiting on that last stall to empty, I get that choice of staring at the wall like I have some mental problem or turn around and stair at the ceiling to let people know I’m not there to watch them pee. Horrible.
Well the fun times continue, when I leave the bathroom we head to the beverage section
, lots of free drinks there. Beer, wine, margaritas, pina colada’s…. tons more and of course the hot thing the last few years, energy drinks, so that when ya get drunk you can stay all hyped up. Their had to be about 10 different new energy drinks there that I’ve never seen or heard of, but I sure the hell tried every one of em. Anyway, here am I getting me a Heineken and I get the first, “Now watch yourself, you are drinking and driving”, 
or “watch out everybody, we have a drunk driver coming through” yes I said the first because any time I’m around alcohol the funny guys have to say that. If it’s in a bar then I hear it over and over, every time I go to the bath room and come back, or from have the people that pass by my table. I could buy Trump out if I had a nickel every time I’ve heard it, but I’m nice, I always throw back my head, let out a 
and say good one. Makes em feel smart and original, but if you ever say it to a person in a wheel chair and they punch you in the nuts afterwards you now know why. So next on the agenda is the drunk ass old horn dog ladies. Today it was two 60+ year old ladies that had to have been standing in the alcohol section way to long.
While I was waiting on a Pina Colada out of a machine, they had to let me know that I had better watch out or they were going to be taking my chair to get themselves around. Again, this is not original and yea if it’s some young hottie then I might be more inclined to give em a ride or what ever (well used to anyway), but when it’s some old lady (almost always is), then I just want to tell them to get a hold of themselves and keep away from the margarita’s. Instead again I’m a nice guy and throw back my head and let out that HAHAHA, and give em that “good one” or “you’ll have to fight me over it” or some other crap.Now if you know me, then you know that most of that was me being my funny self, however it was all true, I had my wife crying from laughter on the way home while bitching about it all in my sarcastic way, which was dangerous as it was raining and we were on one of the busier highways through Dallas. Does it all really drive me nuts though? Hell yes.
That was my great day!! How was yours?
This post has been edited by Texaswheelz: 26 June 2007 - 09:48 PM
