[Ches]

Why is it, everytime I go out and run into some drunk friend, they insist I need a lap dance. Its like some magnetic field between their ass and my chair.. Its like people cant help it. It was funny the first time or two but now it just gets annoying. I dont want ass in my face. Im saving all those experiences for my next life, as a dog.

Am I the only one who has this problem? I highly doubt it. And Im sure you guys wouldnt consider this a problem. Unless it was another dude with his balls in your face.

This post has been edited by Ches: 18 November 2007 - 04:11 AM

[Illinois Boy]

Ches, on Nov 17 2007, 10:10 PM, said:

Why is it, everytime I go out and run into some drunk friend, they insist I need a lap dance. Its like some magnetic field between their ass and my chair.. Its like people cant help it. It was funny the first time or two but now it just gets annoying. I dont want ass in my face. Im saving all those experiences for my next life, as a dog.

Am I the only one who has this problem? I highly doubt it. And Im sure you guys wouldnt consider this a problem. Unless it was another dude with his balls in your face.

Now That's F#cking Hilarious! I could use a good lap dance, but NO BALLS

[nomis]

Maybe your ass-focussed friends still feel awkward relating to you. Next time kindly ask them if they are afraid to relate normally.

But I've found being in a w/chair has doomed me to repeated assaults from bums in the face every time I join a crowd. In my many years of extensive and sometimes intensive research I've worked out that it is only one in 57.5 bums in the face that are acceptable and most of those have boyfriends nearby.

[juls]

I've only had a couple of lap dances..both male and female!
My problem is that everyone wants to sit on me..the fact that they weigh 3 times my weight doesn't seem to concern them. The more I protest, the more they squish their butts into me...it's not easy being around drunk people when you're in a chair huh!!

[Ches]

My friends are dumb. Its always the drunk guy, who wants to bang me and realizes now I cant get away. I guess this is some drunk mating ritual. Jesus its pathetic.

I get the friends who think its funny to sit in my lap as well. I have no problem just pushing people off me, or if someone tries to back their ass on me and park it, I will roll back. Kinda like pulling the chair out from behind someone. They hate that.

But I hate them. So its ok, right?

[Texaswheelz]

Push em away.... LOL, funny you bring this up, my brother was trying to talk me into going to Babydolls here in Dallas tonight. I don't mind the lap dances there and have gotten quite a few free ones. Also been to a few bars and gotten some from some old drunk ladies i didn't care to get from while in a pool hall or bar or some other place that has old ladies drinking to much.

So yea lap dances can be a blessing in some places but bad thing in other places

[DaveP]

lol - just had a flash-back... to my brother's weddin!

An "ageing hippy" woman at my brother's wedding decided to give me a lap dance, at the reception, in front of the entire party! She was well pissed and after doing a little dance in front of me and lifting up her skirt to show she had no knickers on, she straddled me, facing me, and started grabbing me and grinding... lol And then the "sexy" look on her face, rolling head and all the noises... lol

I don't like be in the "spot light", so when I turned to see the entire wedding party all watching the show, women with their mouths open and most guys laughing, I just sat and took it "like a man"!

She then thrust her tits in my face and we tipped backwards. There I was, on my back with this drunk woman straddled across me... and the whole room starring at us! It was so funny... I remember it like it was yesterday...

[Big Valley]

Well Ches I would say you are getting the extra attention because you are hot and the drunk guys are not very creative. So the first thing that comes to their mind is "lap dance the chick. That will be a cool thing to do. I am so wild."

Just like the same lame jokes you hear and those people think they are first to ever say them to you.

So treat these drunks just like any girl would treat a drunk coming on to them they don't want. "Get the f*@k away/off me you shit head!"

They may out weigh you but make it clear you don't want this attention and it isn't funny to you.

I also get the used as a seat thing but I don't have dudes on me so I don't mind. The bumper sticker still reads "No fat chicks."

[azx43]

I have to agree w/ Nomis and Big Valley! Just because you are a person who uses a wheelchair doesn't mean that you have lost the ability to be a regiular person, and they should respect your space. Use your upper body strength, be firm (but polite), and MAKE IT VERY CLEAR that you don't want thAt kind of attention. I deal width many different kinds of people a lot, both proffesionally and non-, and I have found that works!!
P.S. If they insist on sitting on you, go ahead and lose the politeness!!

[alyssa]

Ches, on Nov 17 2007, 11:10 PM, said:

I dont want ass in my face. Im saving all those experiences for my next life, as a dog.

haaha. i wish i had footage of how hard i laughed at that.

[Ches]

HaHa Im funny

[KarenFerguson]

Yes, drunk guys are idiots & the fact that they have gotten to the "totally stupid drunk state" just proves they are in fact idiots.

But yeah, I've gotten the ass in the face lap dance a few times. More often (because my lap is quite small), I just the "let's dance!" and the drunk idiots will get on their knees (before falling over) and start "dancing" in front of me. Back off buddy, I'm not interested. I even got that awhile ago at a party with my husband a few new years eve's back. I was totally embarrassed. Do they think this is appealing? Just know that others around you also think this drunk guy is an idiot, so he's not impressing any girl at the bar.

Anyway, like others above me said, tell them to respect your personal space and go, or come back when they sober up so you can have an actual conversation.

I'm just happy I'm married and don't have to put up with those drunk idiots anymore. Whew.