[babybear]

hi guys ...i dont know whats wrong with me,i cant stop crying...i like going out with my friends or boyfriend and have fun and do stuff...so saturday i was on my way to meet my boyfriend at the mall,i got there and suddenly i could'nt get out of the car...i didnt wanna see people,i felt so different and ugly...watching people pass by made me wanna cry,vommit ect...i drove back home feeling sick,my boyfriend called,i didnt know what to tell him,so i lied and sad i had a headache,he was kind of angry with me...since then i cant stop crying...i see couples walking side by side holding hands and i wish and wish that was me...do any of you guys get like that sometimes?am i loosing it?

i have been a para since 1996....i should be over it by now...

[Georgia7]

Hi,
For sure that feeling is common.I have been paralysed since i was one but believe you me i still sit by the window watch lovers stroll n' cry to myself wishing i was in their shoes.I see my fellow ladies strutting their stuff n' am like i wonder what shape i wld have been?It's ok to cry its just dangerous to make it a habit coz like it or not this thing is here to stay n' u got to deal with that reality.U shld count urself lucky u even have a boyfrnd some of us are so lonely its sickening.Just take one day at a time dear.Some days will be bright others cloudy but the choice is yours.
Now u can wipe thoz tears n' give us that beautiful smile!there u go,that's my girl!!!!!!!!
Later.

[Mike (c4-5) & Lorena]

babybear, on Apr 21 2008, 08:33 AM, said:

hi guys ...i dont know whats wrong with me,i cant stop crying...i like going out with my friends or boyfriend and have fun and do stuff...so saturday i was on my way to meet my boyfriend at the mall,i got there and suddenly i could'nt get out of the car...i didnt wanna see people,i felt so different and ugly...watching people pass by made me wanna cry,vommit ect...i drove back home feeling sick,my boyfriend called,i didnt know what to tell him,so i lied and sad i had a headache,he was kind of angry with me...since then i cant stop crying...i see couples walking side by side holding hands and i wish and wish that was me...do any of you guys get like that sometimes?am i loosing it?

i have been a para since 1996....i should be over it by now...

Gosh, what can anyone say? You are a woman and yes our emotions sometimes get the best of us. Even the non-disabled like myself sometimes feel overwhelmed. Life is tuff for many of us, sometimes I too just want to scream and cry cry cry. Maybe you should tell your boyfriend. Mike knows when I am going through my emotions. He runs when I want him near and comes to me when I want to be left alone. He never gets it right. It might be a man/woman thing, but he (and a bit more me) thinks it’s just me. He sees things black and white and I see every color.

Not knowing your issues, it could be 100 tiny things, 1 big and two average things that have built up to make you cry. Or, you just want to cry. I like to watch movies that make me cry. It’s a good reason to cry and a stress reliever too. My hubby never quit gets it. But he tries. lol

[babybear]

thank you guys so much for taking time to respond...i dont know what i would do without you guys..

[Tired of hurting]

babybear, on Apr 21 2008, 08:33 AM, said:

hi guys ...i dont know whats wrong with me,i cant stop crying...i like going out with my friends or boyfriend and have fun and do stuff...so saturday i was on my way to meet my boyfriend at the mall,i got there and suddenly i could'nt get out of the car...i didnt wanna see people,i felt so different and ugly...watching people pass by made me wanna cry,vommit ect...i drove back home feeling sick,my boyfriend called,i didnt know what to tell him,so i lied and sad i had a headache,he was kind of angry with me...since then i cant stop crying...i see couples walking side by side holding hands and i wish and wish that was me...do any of you guys get like that sometimes?am i loosing it?

i have been a para since 1996....i should be over it by now...

Babybear, Here is a warm hug for youXOXOX. It sounds like your a little depressed. Whats up? Is it your boyfriend and fears of loosing him. Or was one of those day where you were tired of people looking at you,and wondering what they think. I hope you stopped crying,but if you haven't head to the drs. for some help. Today I hope the sun shines on you and warms your heart...I don't think we will ever be over this whole mess, just a bump in the road. We all have bad days..

[KarenFerguson]

Being disabled all my life, I've totally had days over the years where I feel like that (crying, quite depressed and frustrated). Just recently hubby & are are trying to have a baby - talk about emotions. It's going on 7 months now, and we're both fine in every way. It's such an emotional roller coaster that I feel like crying when ever I see a baby or toddler.

I know what you mean with couples walking together hand in hand. I've never experienced that and wish I could. Hubby's in a chair too and I envy those couples just walking around normally.

Anyway, just knows that you're not alone in your feelings.

[Webwych]

Babybear, it sounds like what you're describing is a panic attack.

Can you identify any areas of your life that are causing you stress or not going the way you want them to? If you can write down all the things that are good about your life and all the things you want to change, that helps you see things far more clearly than when your emotions are getting in the way. Fixing things in small chunks is the best way to help yourself.

There's no 'right way' to come to terms with your disability. Nor is there a set time limit for phases you have to go through emotionally and physically so don't let anyone tell you that you should be 'over' anything by now - it's an entirely personal process.

Have you had any counselling? It doesn't suite everyone but if you think it might work for you then give it a go, you've got nothing to lose.

((HUG)).

This post has been edited by Webwych: 21 April 2008 - 04:18 PM

[carole338]

Babybear,

I am just past one year and I still can't get over the crying. I was so bad in the beginning I had to go on Lexapro. I still cry when I think of what I put my husband through and what his life is like now. He gives me the assurance I need but sometimes I just can't stop.

I guess you just need to know it is OK sometimes to let your feelings out. There is nothing wrong with you that an SCI cure wouldn't fix. We are all here for you and are pulling for you.

XOXOXO
Carole

[qbounce]

Hi Carole338,
I have to side with Webwych on your possible problem. My wife used to get 'panic attacks' alot until she was perscribed antidepressants. This has helped balance her emotions immensely!

Shakes, weak, crying, trouble breathing (hyperventilating), are all symptoms of panic attacks. I'm not possitive that's what you have, of course, but your scenario sure sounds familiar.

I hope you feel better soon

[babybear]

thanks guys i am feeling much better...the funny thing is i am studying psychology and cant seem to help myself...karen dont worry so much,you gonna make an excellent mother...

[Webwych]

There's a good book that helped my mum a lot when she had ME/CFS and was getting panic attacks, called 'Self Help for your Nerves' by DR Claire Weekes. It shouldn't be more than $10 and is readily available in bookshops.

[nomis]

babybear, on Apr 22 2008, 01:33 AM, said:

...am i loosing it?

I doubt it. You're more likely just beginning to find it.

I hit a big realisation after 13 years post injury and was on/off tearful for quite some time (and I'm a big boy!). I came out the other end wiser (I claim) and stronger.

So, congrats babybear, you're reaching your milestones much faster than I did. Let yourself go where your body and emotions want to take you - they know best.