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Looking For Encouragement


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#1 bluebutterflyrn

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Posted 01 November 2005 - 02:52 AM

I'm a registered nurse who has fallen in love with a T-8 paraplegic who was a patient of mine at the rehabilitation center where a used to work. I found him very attractive from the start, but as got to know him as a person I realized that I was falling in love with him. I didn't realize how much I really did love him until I was recently faced with a very difficult decision. My employer gave me the choice of either my job or end the relationship. The relationship never interfered with my job performance because the time we spent together was on my days off or at the end of the shift when I was off the clock. I chose the relationship; I can have many other jobs, but the love of your life only comes around once. It has been so hard being away from each other (the facility is a long ways from my house). He has spent several days with me on my days off from my new job. It's so hard to send him back after being together. I thought it might get easier with time, but it only gets worse. He spent this past weekend with me and I cried the last 3 hours we were together because I wanted him to stay so bad. I desperately want to bring him home for good, but I've caught alot of slack from friends and family members who think it's a bad ideal. I'm writing this here because I know all of you understand. I plan on bringing him home by the first of next year. I just need alot of prayers and encouragement because I know this won't be easy, but I'm willing to make sacrifices to be with the man I love.

#2 Apparelyzed

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Posted 01 November 2005 - 08:18 AM

Hi,

My current wife and I were in exactly the same situation as yourself 14 years ago, exept my wife was not forced to leave as we kept our relationship very quite.

Here is some more info on my story: http://www.apparelyz...p?showtopic=507

Follow your heart !

Simon :D

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#3 bluebutterflyrn

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Posted 01 November 2005 - 09:47 PM

Thank you so much Simon for your response. I enjoyed reading about your daughter, what a beautiful story! I hope our future will be as bright.

#4 *Guest_Jodi*

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Posted 08 November 2005 - 12:45 AM

Follow your heart. I am going through a situation very much like your own. My friend is a T-8 paraplegic at the rehab facility where I work. I have been warned against having a relationship with him. We do the same thing as you. We get together at the end of my shift. As I read your posting I felt like I was reading a story about my life. :unsure: My thoughts and prayers are with you. I would love to know how this works out for you. Feel free to e-mail me.

#5 Jodi

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Posted 08 November 2005 - 12:47 AM

Sorry, I wasn't logged on. Now you can get my e-mail address. (I'm new at this) :unsure:

#6 AHolland

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Posted 09 November 2005 - 02:43 AM

My father-in-law told my wife that she should think about dumping me because of my disability. Lucky for me she did'nt listen.

As I said in another post, I do think it is important that you think about what you are getting into. It is certainly an extra burden on any relationship. This does'nt mean it can't work. Like any union of souls, there are days when do-do hits the fan. Make sure he is the right man for you and it will work. Take things slow and enjoy the moment.

As a side note, I am surprised your employer could let you go over dating a patient. I understand the need to have workers and patients separated, but if people want to be together, then how can anyone hold their job as retribution. Pretty much every girl I ever went out with I met through work. I don't want to raise a fuss, but is that legal in the UK?
T4/T5

#7 bluebutterflyrn

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Posted 11 November 2005 - 03:26 AM

Thank you so much Jodi and A. Holland for your responses. Jodi, best of luck with your relationship. It's not easy, but if you really love someone, it's worth all of the extra trouble. Please keep in touch and let me know how things are going. I'm new at this too, I guess you have access to my e-mail address, if you have trouble just post me here.
A.Holland, thank you for your insight. I'm sorry your father-in-law is so shallow-minded that he wanted your wife to leave you when you substained your injury. Did he never here the part of the marriage vows about "in sickness and health"? God bless her for staying with you. I understand your concern about the difficulties that this relationship poses. I was in a severly abusive relationship for 8 years (married for 5 of them) to a man I thought hung the moon. I've had several relationships since my divorce, but I never had any deep feelings for any of them. When I met my love, I felt the same deep love that I had once felt and never thought I'd feel again. And for once, I felt love in return. Want to know something funny? Our first date was to a Def Leppard concert on what would have been my 8th wedding anniversary. Needless to say I had alot more fun on this occasion. About the job situation, here in Tennessee (US) employers have what is called "employment at will", which basically means they can get rid of you at any time for any reason, unless you can prove it was illegal. Which in my case was because of numerous reasons, one being that I reported to the state department of wrong-doing in the facility. I've spoke with a lawyer about my situation and I have a good case against them, it's just next to impossible to prove anything against them.




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